First joke is priceless.
An asthmatic man is outside late at night in a graveyard. He decides to go grave-robbing, as his friends peer pressured him to. He finds a grave that he anticipates holds a very rich man. He soon starts to dig up the grave. After digging for so long, he finally he reaches the coffin. Wheezing, he opens the coffin and sees no jewelry or items of value. Suddenly he hears sirens and hurries to escape. But the skeleton in the coffin grabs his leg and says, "Can you dig it, Sucka?"