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Am I Being Unreasonable?

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#1
My best friend lives about an hour from my house. It's a long haul but I still go out there quite a bit (maybe 2 or 3 times a week). Now on the other hand, she hardly ever drives out to my house. I'm fine with that. She doesn't make much money and has a two year old who's father will not pay child support, so I understand.

My problem is that she'll ask me to come out, and one out of three times she isn't even home. :mad: She doesn't leave a note saying when she'll be back. She always comes back, but I have to wait anywhere from ten to forty-five minutes. Is it me or is that extremely rude, considering the amount of time, money, and energy it takes to go out there? And if I say something she just laughs, like she thinks its cute. Hell with that. See, if she lived 10 minutes from me (like she used to) I wouldn't care. I'd just say piss on it and go back home. But since she lives so far away, I feel it would be a waste to leave as soon as I realize she isn't there. I didn't drive out there for nothing.

And I'm not the only one she does it to. She's like that with just about everyone. I was going to impose a fifteen minute rule: if she's not there in ten minutes, I'll just leave. But that isn't fair to me either.

I'm thinking if it happens again, I'll just start declining her invitations til she can get her shit straight.

What do you think?
 

meh_it_all

WTF.com Sexy Pimp-ette.
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I think you need to make sure she's goona be there, I don't understand why she would invite you over and then go out thats a bit strange. Like before you go over ask if she's planning on being there, and tell her that you're being serious, and it's not funny when you have to wait around. The truth is the only way around this. Make it all serious, ya know serious face and stuff. :)
No you're not being unreasonable, what's the point of going to see someone and then them not being there, what the hell? "Oh shit, well ya know, I guess I wasn't fucking counting on them being here, even though they invited me?!" :confuse: Geez.
 

skwabari_shtcak

sugar daddies welcome
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Charge her gas money or make her come visit you. Show her your not made of money.
 

Sinamon

~Broken Angel~
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yah I like that idea ^^^. But I know how it is when you have a kid and all. I have two. But still, she shouldnt be so shady toward you, especially when she asked you to come out there in the begining. Just keep declining her invites for a while and she'll get the hint and ask what's up and then you can be totally honest. Good luck. Keep us posted. :thumbsup:
 
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sinamon said:
Keep us posted. :thumbsup:
Alright, got an update.

Matters finally came to a head this weekend. A group of us went camping, and J (my friend I was telling you about) basically took over and made a bunch of plans without consulting anybody. She had me come all the way out to the campsite, when she was planning on going to see fireworks all the way up at some place about 10 minutes from my house. I was pissed cause she should have just told me to meet them up there. Things just escalated from there. We had too many people to fit in one car, so her room mate rode with me. We got to talking about J and realized it wasn't our imaginations and J really has been acting up lately. A lot of things were said........things I'm sure neither one of us meant.

Well, the next day J wanted to go see fireworks again. Her room mate, her room mate's boyfriend and I stayed behind. We ended up packing our shit and leaving while the others were gone. When they came back and saw that we were gone J was pissed. Long story short, it came to a point where I had to tell her what was going on.

Her room mate told her I was pissed off, which makes me mad cause I wanted to talk to J about this face to face. But her roomy told her so I ended up having to deal with it over the phone.

Anyways, shit's okay now. J knows how I feel and I apologized for not saying something sooner. That's about the gist of it. :happysad:
 

Sinamon

~Broken Angel~
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Well Im glad it worked out. I had hoped one of our ideas worked. Im glad you guys finally were able to sit down and chat about it...and work it out between the two of you. :thumbsup:
 
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#7
Grrrrr............just when I thought it was safe to breathe again, it turns out J's roomy is pissed off at me. God, I fucking hate drama bullshit! According to her I went back on everything I said about J and told her I never said I had a problem with her. What a crock of shit! When J called me the next day (after we left the campgrounds) I was at WORK, not really the best place to have a discussion about how I was upset with her. I did tell her I thought she had an attitude, and none of us wanted to be there, but like I said I was at work and didn't want to get into with her. I'll admit I held back from saying everything I wanted to say, so I can sort of understand why her roomy would think that; but don't fucking put words in my mouth! The words "I never said I had a problem with you" NEVER left my mouth. I just refrained from telling J everything because I wanted the chance to sit down and talk to her about it in person when we had plenty of time to work things out. Fuckin A. I can't wait til the three of us can all sit down together and I can ask J, right in front of her room mate, if I ever said that shit. I wonder what her excuse will be when J says no.