WTF ... IS WTF!?
We are a collective of people who believe in freedom of speech, the rights of individuals, and free pancakes! We share our lives, struggles, frustrations, successes, joys, and prescribe to our own special brand of humor and insanity. If you are looking for a great place to hang out, make new friends, find new nemeses, and just be yourself, WTF.com is your new home.

Bad vacation mishaps

tkme2thebedroom

standard people-hater
207
0
0
#1
I just got back from a big vacation and I have this aweful sunburn on both my shins. The skin is swollen and red and very owie. To make matters worse, I have sand in places i didn't even know it was possible to get sand in! And no, I do not have pics....sadly. Would be so good, don't you think? So last night I slept in my bed in Oscoda Michigan with tons of aloe ver all over my body and I woke up to a greenish sticky bed that looked like and oompa loompa was whacking off in my poor little bed. Erlack.
 

Gotmilk

Flame Bait
8
0
0
#2
tkme2thebedroom said:
...and I woke up to a greenish sticky bed that looked like and oompa loompa was whacking off in my poor little bed. Erlack.

Hilarious.
 

tkme2thebedroom

standard people-hater
207
0
0
#5
PatticusRex said:
Did you manage to catch the oompa loompa?
You know, I looked and looked, but I just couldn't find the little fucker. As I was walking along on the beach I saw a green wig washing up with the waves, so I assume the little ass raped me in my sleep and had such a good time, he decided he could die happy and drowned himself. I hope he used a condom. Hehe....snugger fit...lol
 
565
0
0
#6
You let Umpa Loompas(sp) wack off in your bed, that's awsome. That sucks about your sunburn, and the sand.
 

bnccoder

Postaholic
2,479
0
36
#7
tkme2thebedroom said:
I just got back from a big vacation and I have this aweful sunburn on both my shins. The skin is swollen and red and very owie. To make matters worse, I have sand in places i didn't even know it was possible to get sand in! And no, I do not have pics....sadly. Would be so good, don't you think? So last night I slept in my bed in Oscoda Michigan with tons of aloe vera all over my body and I woke up to a greenish sticky bed that looked like and oompa loompa was whacking off in my poor little bed. Erlack.
Sad to hear there are no pics. Do you have blisters from the sunburn or otherwise?
 

bombchu

b-o-n-e-r
395
0
0
#8
Oompa loompa ROFL

I fucking feel for you lol...

That shit happened to me because I went to Florida with my friends.
They said they were gonna go eat in 30 minutes, so I said I was going to take a nap till then. And those fucks didn't wake me up. I woke up 3 hours later looking like the Red Lobster special. So pissed.

Cool water baths work wonders.
I recommend the bath over oompaloompa bukake.
 

LiberatioN

Trance Addict
1,432
0
100
#9
"remember to exfoliate when you get out of the water so you dont burn and make sure to wear plenty of suntan lotion!
...wanna get high?"
 

meh_it_all

WTF.com Sexy Pimp-ette.
5,034
3
132
#12
But, Oompa Loompa's are orange.. :confused:
But! they have orange hair, so it's on their hair they get the colour of their semen from?
 

tkme2thebedroom

standard people-hater
207
0
0
#14
bnccoder said:
Sad to hear there are no pics. Do you have blisters from the sunburn or otherwise?
Actually, no. No blisters, just really bad peeling. It's better today, but I tripped on some stairs and OHMYFUCKINGGIDDYGOD it hurt a lot. I just screaked FUCK and pissed off my mum.
 

tkme2thebedroom

standard people-hater
207
0
0
#15
meh_it_all said:
But, Oompa Loompa's are orange.. :confused:
But! they have orange hair, so it's on their hair they get the colour of their semen from?
You mean they have green hair. And yes, the green hair would suggest that under their orangy exterior flows a stream of green gooey candy-like stuff. Why? Because I say so. And oompa loompas are funny shit, man.
 

tkme2thebedroom

standard people-hater
207
0
0
#16
LiberatioN said:
"remember to exfoliate when you get out of the water so you dont burn and make sure to wear plenty of suntan lotion!
...wanna get high?"
i did indeed exfoliate afterwards, which is when my burn developed into a bright sheen of pinky redy ickness. And I would get high, what with my injury and all, but they just outlawed medicinal marajuana. Damn you big brother!!!
 

tkme2thebedroom

standard people-hater
207
0
0
#17
bombchu said:
Oompa loompa ROFL

I fucking feel for you lol...

That shit happened to me because I went to Florida with my friends.
They said they were gonna go eat in 30 minutes, so I said I was going to take a nap till then. And those fucks didn't wake me up. I woke up 3 hours later looking like the Red Lobster special. So pissed.

Cool water baths work wonders.
I recommend the bath over oompaloompa bukake.
Cool. Rock lobster? A ha ha ha. Hey, come on, that's funny. And also eeeeew oompa loompa bukake! ::Yuck, hack, cough, spit, puke.::