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Bread Crumbs

teh anarchist

Around this time last summer, I had my first real chance to get drunk. So guess what I did... Between my best friend, Colin, and myself we had 16 shots of 80 proof Smirnoff vodka, as well as a six-pack of beer. All was fun and joyous that night ... and knowing of the dreaded hangover, I made us both drink 2 bottles of water (which I don't remember doing).

So anyways, the next morning, I wake up covered in bread crumbs, not remembering anything after my 6th shot or so, and I'm wearing nothing but a pair of jeans ... Colin's pair of jeans actually - and no underwear. :confuse: I get up and am actually feeling alright, and then get him up. After he gets out of the blanket he's wrapped in, we find him wearing nothing but boxers (his). I start laughing my ass off and am like ... dude - WHAT THE FUCK... - the entire time still brushing these bread crumbs off me. We get out of my basement and I give him some clothes of mine and send him home after he had cleaned out the sink he threw up in (it was skyline chili - no doubt it was his).

I go back downstairs and find his clothes in the cabinet under the sink he just cleaned out - covered in vomit. Which was actually a relief, but still didn't explain why I was in his pants. I then went upstairs into my room to find every article of my own clothing, also covered in vomit. So that's why I'm his pants ... BIG relief.

So I'm about to call him and tell him the somewhat good news .. but can't find my cell phone. So I search and search for it.. and eventually find it within the bowels of my couch, under the cushions ... covered in- well take a guess...

I'm thinking "okay .. he threw up on himself .. took his vomit-covered clothing off.. and I threw up on my clothes and couldn't find pants of my own in the dark .. so I took his clean ones.. Then I went downstairs and passed out, but picked up the couch cushion, threw up, and put the cushion back? Okay .. I was really drunk .. I can deal with it." I cleaned up my phone and stuff, put all of our clothes in the washer, and went to go take a shower and get the remaining bread crumbs off of me. These things are still everywhere .. I'm talking, all over my chest, legs, neck, and even in my hair ... it's the only thing I haven't figured out yet.

So I get into this shower ... and all these "bread crumbs" liquefy into this oily, EXTREMELY foul smelling substance.

These were not bread crumbs. :mad: And I quickly scrubbed myself clean of it.

If you don't understand what they were, PM me.


Balls...........ew, this story should be in Gross Misconduct! I nearly puked just reading it! :sick:
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Hooked on Rocks!
So what really happened in your first time drunken stupor?

Two boys drinking, not remembering what happened, half neked, you in his pants!!!!!!!!

I wonder if this :beerchug: turned into this :dance:

I dunno! It certainly has all the makings!