WTF ... IS WTF!?
We are a collective of people who believe in freedom of speech, the rights of individuals, and free pancakes! We share our lives, struggles, frustrations, successes, joys, and prescribe to our own special brand of humor and insanity. If you are looking for a great place to hang out, make new friends, find new nemeses, and just be yourself, WTF.com is your new home.

Do Not Trespass!

4,020
3
36
#1
I'm probably going to sound like one of those hilljacks who sit out on their porch in a rocking chair, rifle in hand, when I say this but oh well. People need to get the fuck off my property! (Well, my parents property, but that's not the point here) What if I wanna go back there and fuck in my treestand!? (hehe) Can't do that, cause these shitnosed little rich kids that live in the nearby housing development think our woods are the goddamn metroparks and they can ride their bikes back there. If these people are so bloody rich, they need to buy some property of their own instead of getting pissed at us when we call them and tell them to keep their offspring out of our yard.

That's one of the (few) things I hate about living in the country. If you have property, people just take it upon themselves to use it for their own recreational purposes. They hunt, have bonfires, drink, ride bikes/quadrunners, build treestands, litter, etc. Just get the fuck out! It would be nice to be able to walk my dog back there without having to worry about being sued after he attacks one of those shithead kids. (He hates children, especially if he doesn't know them). Or worry about myself or one of my nephews being shot by some dipshit hunter, or run over by a quad runner.

They just don't get the point. They rip down our No Trespassing signs. We tell the kids' parents, and they act like their kids have every right to be back there and we should be the ones to adjust. :mad:

We tell the hunters if they want to hunt we don't care, just let us know first so we know not to go back there. We tell them time and time again but they never do it.

The other night there were three guys back there riding four-wheelers at 1 o'clock in the morning. Assholes! It doesn't help to phone the authorities, cause all we have is a worthless sheriff who wouldn't show up for hours after we call, if at all.

Fucking people. You want land? GET YOUR OWN!!!
 
3,559
4
0
#2
tl;dr. You should put a for sale sign in your yard and a no trespassing sing, and ask the people "Do you really want this house" while holding a gun. :rofl:
 

CopyLifted

Funnier than a 5th grader
4,790
86
0
#3
Build a fence? Or better yet...just shoot them.
 

magnolia

Postaholic
4,093
61
112
#4
Z, call the cops and have them confiscate the bikes and all property that isn't yours. Then put up a no tresspassing sign. If you find them on your property again after that, call the cops and ask them to come out because you have tresspassers on your property and you'd like them removed. Then let the cops take those bloody rich bastards home to their parents. It's not legal for the kids to be on your property without your permission. So I say you take action.
 

Darklight

Oppressing your posts...
5,438
95
142
#5
CopyLifted said:
Build a fence? Or better yet...just shoot them.
was what i was going to say... the build a fence part... or at least a bed of spikes at the outter parts to pop the tires of the bikers...
 
4,020
3
36
#6
Darklight said:
was what i was going to say... the build a fence part... or at least a bed of spikes at the outter parts to pop the tires of the bikers...
Yeah, but then my nephews or my dogs might step on them.
 

UberSkippy

a.k.a. FuckTheBullShit
7,529
63
142
#7
Nah, they don't have to be there for very long. Just put the spikes down, pop a few tires... problem solved.

If they build a tree stand, rip it down and take the lumber. They abandoned it on your property.

If they start a bon fire, run out there with fire extinguishers and hoze them all down.

Take a moment and send out fliers notifying the families of land useage fees. Since their kids are riding on your property you have to pay to maintain the land as well as the liability insurance (because if one of the fucks falls and gets a booboo on your land you can get beaned for it.) Let them know there is a minimum charge of 1 hour useage PER person on the land and that the useage fees are $1,000 per hour per person. Back it up with bills.

If they ride bikes with plates, get the plates. Then send their folks a bill for the damage they did to your property. Take photos as well.

Pretty quick you'll be known as the crazy fuckers and the kids will be kept away.
 

polaris_nine

Banned - What an Asshat!
1,457
2
0
#8
We live on the corner of our street, and have been in the division since before it got crowded, but now since every stinkin yuppie in town parked their shitty asses there, all the kids cross through our yard to the other street, instead of just going around. There is not a lot of wood at the corner, just maybe an acre, no more, and they either cross through the driveway or just right through the backyard. My dog, who is friendly, but only to us, might just attack them, and frankly, I dont want them around my other two outside cats, becuase some of those kids are mean! How do I know their not fucking (not in a sexual way) around with the animals back there?


Anywho, I like all the above ideas, dont try to scare them away, just take it straight to the parents, or the police. Better yet, give some photos and footage to a media station, and they'll go hassle the kids and parents, they love doing that.
 

Nailbomb

I'm just really nice.
4,475
2,799
332
#9
polaris_nine said:
We live on the corner of our street, and have been in the division since before it got crowded, but now since every stinkin yuppie in town parked their shitty asses there, all the kids cross through our yard to the other street, instead of just going around. There is not a lot of wood at the corner, just maybe an acre, no more, and they either cross through the driveway or just right through the backyard. My dog, who is friendly, but only to us, might just attack them, and frankly, I dont want them around my other two outside cats, becuase some of those kids are mean! How do I know their not fucking (not in a sexual way) around with the animals back there?
Heh, I used to have that same problem, only worse. We lived on the second house from the corner, and our driveway made a perfect shortcut. We also lived across the street from my high school, and the stadium was directly across the street, so we'd not only get people cutting through ALL the time, they'd regularly park their cars in our driveway and even occasionally our yard. The police where we lived were pretty crazy, and after getting sick of having cars towed off our lawn, they suggested we wait until they get into the stadium and smash some windows. That's right, the police told us to smash car windows. There'd usually be at least one poor fuck driving away without a windshield or a driver's side window every week. I think that whenever someone called the cops about it the police would tell em that it's their fault for parking there, and they were basically SOL. Heh, we probably could have even robbed the hell out of those people and gotten away with it.
 

BrIONwoshMunky

EVERYBODY LOVE EVERYBODY!
Staff
9,737
4,276
387
#10
zoloftcasserole said:
Fucking people. You want land? GET YOUR OWN!!!

I live in the country. We own a few hundred acres. And dad is a rather avid hunter. So folks on his land, that he bought and paid for, isn't kosher with him. If you can get into contact with your local branch of Conservation Officers, or Game Wardens, or whatever the DNR enforcement peoples are in your area, they'd be more than willing to help with your unauthorized hunters. As for the kids, if you post your property, i.e. "POSTED: Private Property" or "NO TRESSPASSING" signs, you could prosecute the little fuckers. If your local sherrif won't help, call the State Police. We've actually allowed the Conservations Officers in our area to litterally camp out in our woods and wait for idiots that seem to think fences grow naturally in the middle of forests...
 
137
1
76
#11
I don't know what state you live in, but here in Texas you can shoot people who are trespassing, so that might be one option. Also, start putting the "No Trespassing." signs in tall grass and welding on electrodes. After a few good zaps maybe the shits would leave them alone. I'm not sure how practical this is, but it sounds like fun to me. :D :cool:
 

polaris_nine

Banned - What an Asshat!
1,457
2
0
#12
Runningflame570 said:
I don't know what state you live in, but here in Texas you can shoot people who are trespassing, so that might be one option.

"Officer, I sincerely thought he was a deer! I mean, look at him, he stinks like one..." :) ;)
 
1,456
2
0
#13
3 words: Frozen Paint Balls.

If you see the lil fuckers, shoot them. It's totally legal, no matter what state you live in, and (particularly if they're frozen) should keep them off your land.
 

BrIONwoshMunky

EVERYBODY LOVE EVERYBODY!
Staff
9,737
4,276
387
#14
Oh and another point of interest. If you are looking to build a line fence. Here in Indiana at least, If a land owner wants to build a line fence, the adjoining property is required to pay for half of it or build half of it. :thumbsup:
 

wocka

Clitpickle
93
0
0
#15
hahaha nice, if it was me i would get a nice paintball gun and just sit out there whenever im bored and shoot the fuck out of them with paintballs, get some nice camo and shit, that will be pretty fun if u ask me. if theres on bikes they usually wear helmets i geuss, so u wouldnt have to worry about pwning their eye balls.
 

polaris_nine

Banned - What an Asshat!
1,457
2
0
#16
Kids? Wear helmets? Nah, its not cool. Kids think they are invincible, give em a reason to think otherwise. :thumbsup:
 
214
0
0
#17
this is what you do, take your shot gun shoot the fuckers and hang their bodies around your property.

there you go, problem solved no more tresspassers