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I prefer the fanfic version of harry potter, Worst fanfic ever. It has delightful passages as
I straightened my hair and made it look all spiky, I felt a little depressed then, so I slit one of my wrists. I read a depressing book while I waited for it to stop bleeding and I listened to some GC. I painted my nails black and put on TONS of black eyeliner. - Chapter 3
And then…………… suddenly just as I Draco kissed me passionately. Draco climbed on top of me and we started to make out keenly against a tree. He took of my top and I took of his clothes. I even took of my bra. Then he put his thingie into my you-know-what and we did it for the first time. - Chapter 4
“I MAY BE A HOGWARTS STUDENT….” Hargirid paused angrily. “BUT I AM ALSO A SATANIST!” - Chapter 11
“Allah Kedavra!” - Chapter 13
"Kool" said Serious as Voldemort and Hedwig started 2 make out sexily. -Chapter 41