Help me piece together wut once was whole. . .
Help me find the remnants of my soul. . .
Help me find the remnants of my soul. . .
Help Me!!!
- Thread starter mmm...cheese
- Start date
How can we do that, EXPLAIN and then we can help you.?
So yes explain... and i'll try. :question:
So yes explain... and i'll try. :question:
Thats all your gunna give us to work with. Come on! we want to help but your not making it easy.
I need help. I have been depressed for such a long time that i no longer know who or wut i am. This is really long story but i try to make it short.
When i was 4. . . my parents would argue constantly. But then i didnt know wut was goin on. So i just stayed away. Then i turned 5, and my mom pressed me so hard 2 achieve that i couldn't be myself. That i strived 4 attention.
That continued, until it got worse. At seven my mom was forcing me to read, and i thought "maybe after a while it will stop."
But it never did. At age 8 my father divorced my mother. Now i know that she was a controlling cow diarea.
Anyway. . . she had 2 keep puttin pressure on my dad and on her kids. and he thought us at 8 yrs could handle it. And we did, but it still landed heavy. Then my dad got screwed up out of pay and stuff. When his bosses thought they could frame him, they did and he ended up getting fired. So he went 2 live in a ghetto, and mom pushed him 2 get another job. So he did, and it was a CRAPPY job. However, mom still made him pay child support $700. And he had to. . . Then he moved when i was nine to a crappier place. bigger but plagued by mice. Also when i was nine, i started 2 have wut one would call "severe depression." So i dealed with it. And dealed with the pressure the kids at school would put on my brother and me. MAN I WAS EVEN FRIKKIN PICKED ON BY MY BABY-SITTERS!!! It sucked. . . I hated them. But mom still hired them. She didnt care. She liked their mom even though her kids sucked. My mom's such an idiot! Then my mom couldnt pay for the house anymore. So i had 2 move away from the friends i had known since i was 4. It sucked. so i moved to another spot. and dad was still in the ghetto. Sometimes mom would invite him over, but that wasn't often. And she started puttin so much pressure, and she became so controlling. That my bro became like her. Cept more powerful. And since dad wasnt there, nothing i could do about it. So i started making silent cries for help. But no help came. I was so depressed nobody cept some1 like 4 yrs older than me could understand. However i could understand like anybody. ^^ i took pride in that. But the pride soon vanished. It was then that i moved 2 a new church, and the suicidal thoughts set in. But a year later when i was 12 they vanished. When i was 11 and still seeing my dad on a regular basis. . . he bought a dog. And that dog i luv. Couldnt stand it if he died. And as time progressed the abuse at school stopped because i became strong. But the abuse at home increased. I have no life at home because my bro and mom control it. I cant do anything without them knowing. And i cant do anything 2 them. So now i sometimes think of suicide because nobody cept my dad fully understand.
SO PLZ HELP ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
When i was 4. . . my parents would argue constantly. But then i didnt know wut was goin on. So i just stayed away. Then i turned 5, and my mom pressed me so hard 2 achieve that i couldn't be myself. That i strived 4 attention.
That continued, until it got worse. At seven my mom was forcing me to read, and i thought "maybe after a while it will stop."
But it never did. At age 8 my father divorced my mother. Now i know that she was a controlling cow diarea.
Anyway. . . she had 2 keep puttin pressure on my dad and on her kids. and he thought us at 8 yrs could handle it. And we did, but it still landed heavy. Then my dad got screwed up out of pay and stuff. When his bosses thought they could frame him, they did and he ended up getting fired. So he went 2 live in a ghetto, and mom pushed him 2 get another job. So he did, and it was a CRAPPY job. However, mom still made him pay child support $700. And he had to. . . Then he moved when i was nine to a crappier place. bigger but plagued by mice. Also when i was nine, i started 2 have wut one would call "severe depression." So i dealed with it. And dealed with the pressure the kids at school would put on my brother and me. MAN I WAS EVEN FRIKKIN PICKED ON BY MY BABY-SITTERS!!! It sucked. . . I hated them. But mom still hired them. She didnt care. She liked their mom even though her kids sucked. My mom's such an idiot! Then my mom couldnt pay for the house anymore. So i had 2 move away from the friends i had known since i was 4. It sucked. so i moved to another spot. and dad was still in the ghetto. Sometimes mom would invite him over, but that wasn't often. And she started puttin so much pressure, and she became so controlling. That my bro became like her. Cept more powerful. And since dad wasnt there, nothing i could do about it. So i started making silent cries for help. But no help came. I was so depressed nobody cept some1 like 4 yrs older than me could understand. However i could understand like anybody. ^^ i took pride in that. But the pride soon vanished. It was then that i moved 2 a new church, and the suicidal thoughts set in. But a year later when i was 12 they vanished. When i was 11 and still seeing my dad on a regular basis. . . he bought a dog. And that dog i luv. Couldnt stand it if he died. And as time progressed the abuse at school stopped because i became strong. But the abuse at home increased. I have no life at home because my bro and mom control it. I cant do anything without them knowing. And i cant do anything 2 them. So now i sometimes think of suicide because nobody cept my dad fully understand.SO PLZ HELP ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Long, but interesting. Dude, don't get all down and suicidal. Sure the past threw you some curves but look to the future to bring better times. If you can't get over your past you will never truly live life. You will never be able to forget but tyr and forgive. You'll be ok, if you start living in the present. Good luck to you.
Was there any point in capitalizing every word in that post? If so I don't see it.mmm...cheese said:
I don't have a problem with anime, it's the dumbasses who are fucking OBSESSED with it I can't stand. Besides, I hate Japan for many more reasons than that, but I digress...
:offtopic:
I'm 14 going on 15 in 3 weeks.
Trust me I KNOW where your coming from. My story is nearly the same.. just i didnt have a sane mother to look after me.
I have depression.
Where that black hole in your stomach hurts so much when you are alone. and you start to cry (just me i guess?)
I think you need to work out these things. I pressed all my emotions down. NOT a good thing to do.
Maybe i can talk to you sometime to help you out.
I feel really bad for you and your story.
Trust me I KNOW where your coming from. My story is nearly the same.. just i didnt have a sane mother to look after me.
I have depression.
Where that black hole in your stomach hurts so much when you are alone. and you start to cry (just me i guess?)
I think you need to work out these things. I pressed all my emotions down. NOT a good thing to do.
Maybe i can talk to you sometime to help you out.
I feel really bad for you and your story.
mmm...cheese said:I need help. I have been depressed for such a long time that i no longer know who or wut i am. This is really long story but i try to make it short.
When i was 4. . . my parents would argue constantly. But then i didnt know wut was goin on. So i just stayed away. Then i turned 5, and my mom pressed me so hard 2 achieve that i couldn't be myself. That i strived 4 attention.
That continued, until it got worse. At seven my mom was forcing me to read, and i thought "maybe after a while it will stop."
But it never did. At age 8 my father divorced my mother. Now i know that she was a controlling cow diarea.
SO PLZ HELP ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Why don't you move out?
Things will get better when you're an adult. Until then you just gotta put up with shit. I know you probably don't wanna hear it, but there's really nothing you can do until you're out and on your own.
I had my own bouts with depression when I was younger and attempted suicide many times... but things are better for me now; I'm in college and well on my way to getting my life on a good track.
Just hang in there.
I had my own bouts with depression when I was younger and attempted suicide many times... but things are better for me now; I'm in college and well on my way to getting my life on a good track.
Just hang in there.
I didn't read all of the posts. I now realize you are only 13 years old. I wouldn't know where you would go being only 13 years old.
What about during the night whey they all sleep?
mmm...cheese said:
What about during the night whey they all sleep?
Such are the trials of the teen aged life.
Yes,why not kill yourself and hand all of lifes problems to someone else. You know nothing of death,how can you think it would be a better place? You know what dead people think of it? They wish they were still living. But by all means, be a number like the rest and give up. Fuckdat!
You're a kid. Sooner than you'd like,your youth WILL be betrayed to age. That's when life gehts fun. You'll work everyday for a pissant pay check. Only to hand it over to the man. You'll have bills out the ass,electric bills,phone bills,morgage payments,car payments,insurance..ect. The man doesn't give a shit,unless it's a check with his name on it.
Soon,you'll have kids of your own going through the same damn thing you're going through now. They're right,you're wrong. Life at some point will geht better. But only if you try. It's never easier,unless it's handed to you. In that case you'll likely not appreciate anything,and you'll still be complaining.
You're only thirteen. What did you expect? At this point in your life,you just now learning how to deal with up and coming adulthood. If you feel the need to relieve some frustrations,head on over to Bait&Tackle and tear into some ass.
Yes,why not kill yourself and hand all of lifes problems to someone else. You know nothing of death,how can you think it would be a better place? You know what dead people think of it? They wish they were still living. But by all means, be a number like the rest and give up. Fuckdat!
You're a kid. Sooner than you'd like,your youth WILL be betrayed to age. That's when life gehts fun. You'll work everyday for a pissant pay check. Only to hand it over to the man. You'll have bills out the ass,electric bills,phone bills,morgage payments,car payments,insurance..ect. The man doesn't give a shit,unless it's a check with his name on it.
Soon,you'll have kids of your own going through the same damn thing you're going through now. They're right,you're wrong. Life at some point will geht better. But only if you try. It's never easier,unless it's handed to you. In that case you'll likely not appreciate anything,and you'll still be complaining.
You're only thirteen. What did you expect? At this point in your life,you just now learning how to deal with up and coming adulthood. If you feel the need to relieve some frustrations,head on over to Bait&Tackle and tear into some ass.
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