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Horror on the cross bronx expressway

MaxPower

You're my number two
Staff
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#1
I woke up today. Sat on the couch with my laptop. Flipped on the news. Much to my dismay, the reporter uttered those words that you hope you'll never hear. I thought it was nothing more than a traffic accident....until....."The cross Bronx is closed due to an overturned tractor trailer full of Corona". They then switched to the aerial view of a bucket loader, un-ceremonially plowing the cool bottles of liquid gold, into piles for disposal.
I think I’ll take the day off today.
 

gurlgonewild

Was machen Sie?
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#2
MaxPower said:
I think I’ll take the day off today.
:rofl:too much to handle huh?

max,
i am deeply sorry to hear about your loss. this is so close to my heart, i too share in your pain. it is very traumatizing when someone so young, fresh and innocent is taken from us. in times like these, allow the good lord to embrace you, he'll heal you so you may find love once more. do not loose faith my brother!

...or are you taking the day off so you can beat everyone to the clean up and have a few free coronas?

~you've made my day~
 

ChilianFuckFace

Banned - What an Asshat!
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#3
MaxPower said:
The cross Bronx is closed due to an overturned tractor trailer full of Corona".
OH NO! The Coronas!!! :( Who cares about the traffic jam, imagine how the people waiting for them coronas are feeling right about now! HORROR!
 

Captain 151

Seeped in a dry Merlot
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#4
I guess I don't watch the news enough. Then again, I always try to avoid the Cross Bronx at all costs anyway. What a shitty road. I don't really care about the Coronas, it's just a shame to see such a loss of alcohol. If they were bottles of rum, I might have cried.
 

DIZNUTS

Ñúñ'§ þêG £ègGéÐ /\/\å±ëý
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#5
tbsrk said:
I guess I don't watch the news enough. Then again, I always try to avoid the Cross Bronx at all costs anyway. What a shitty road. I don't really care about the Coronas, it's just a shame to see such a loss of alcohol. If they were bottles of rum, I might have cried.
i would have cried too
 

Skitch0o0

Put it in MY butt...
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#6
MaxPower said:
I woke up today. Sat on the couch with my laptop. Flipped on the news. Much to my dismay, the reporter uttered those words that you hope you'll never hear. I thought it was nothing more than a traffic accident....until....."The cross Bronx is closed due to an overturned tractor trailer full of Corona". They then switched to the aerial view of a bucket loader, un-ceremonially plowing the cool bottles of liquid gold, into piles for disposal.
I think I’ll take the day off today.
OMG! And they haven´t closed down the schools and government offices yet down here in Mexico! Shit! I need to go tell somebody!
 

MaxPower

You're my number two
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#7
BWT the driver was alright, and no other injuries. Or whatever.
 
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#8
At least it wasn't vodka. If it was vodka I would hang my flag at half-mass.
 

Captain 151

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#9
I hate the FCC said:
At least it wasn't vodka. If it was vodka I would hang my flag at half-mass.
Pshhhttt cmon, vodka is the least of our worries. You can get fucking vodka anywhere, anytime. Not too bad of a loss. Then again if it was grey goose, or that other vodka that starts with an S and is from Sweden i thinik.... Svetka or something like that, then its a loss. Other wise, vodka is vodka.
 

DIZNUTS

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#10
tbsrk said:
Pshhhttt cmon, vodka is the least of our worries. You can get fucking vodka anywhere, anytime. Not too bad of a loss. Then again if it was grey goose, or that other vodka that starts with an S and is from Sweden i thinik.... Svetka or something like that, then its a loss. Other wise, vodka is vodka.
yea especially if its cheap russian vodka that fucks you up from one shot and burns a hole in your throat big enough to stick a dick in....so after drinkin half a bottle of it you end up layin in the fetal position with a dick in your mouth,throat, and ass....now how bout that kind of hang over?
 

ChilianFuckFace

Banned - What an Asshat!
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#11
DIZNUTS said:
yea especially if its cheap russian vodka that fucks you up from one shot and burns a hole in your throat big enough to stick a dick in....so after drinkin half a bottle of it you end up layin in the fetal position with a dick in your mouth,throat, and ass....now how bout that kind of hang over?
You my friend have drank way too much cheap vodka and have some fucked up friends who would abuse you in such way and/or let alone in the wrong place at the wrong time so you can be abused in such ways. Either way, you shouldn't drink anymore, and should look for new friends. :(
 

Skitch0o0

Put it in MY butt...
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#12
DIZNUTS said:
yea especially if its cheap russian vodka that fucks you up from one shot and burns a hole in your throat big enough to stick a dick in....so after drinkin half a bottle of it you end up layin in the fetal position with a dick in your mouth,throat, and ass....now how bout that kind of hang over?
Have those often?
 

gurlgonewild

Was machen Sie?
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#13
EKKKKKKKKK! GAD i am going to have a coniption!!!!!!!
i am saddened by all your unappreciative comments regarding vodka. :(
well that & that beer is second to hard liquor in my book. but vodka, is not vodka. cheap vodka is cheap vodka...agreed. but if you spend a few bucks more good vodka is waaaaay better than the cheap or even the middle of the road stuff.

high quality vodka like grey goose and belvedere don't compare to say, shmirnoff (middle), and fleishmans (low or worse quality).

-displaced passion, agreed.
 

DIZNUTS

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#14
ChilianFuckFace said:
You my friend have drank way too much cheap vodka and have some fucked up friends who would abuse you in such way and/or let alone in the wrong place at the wrong time so you can be abused in such ways. Either way, you shouldn't drink anymore, and should look for new friends. :(
sheesh it didnt happen to me.....but i did find 1 of the dudes passed out like that in another room when i was lookin 4 extra condoms...
 

ChilianFuckFace

Banned - What an Asshat!
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#15
DIZNUTS said:
sheesh it didnt happen to me.....but i did find 1 of the dudes passed out like that in another room when i was lookin 4 extra condoms...
You should have taken pics... If you did, please post. (with mods permission) :thumbsup:
 

DIZNUTS

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#16
ChilianFuckFace said:
You should have taken pics... If you did, please post. (with mods permission) :thumbsup:
no i didnt have a camera then..wasnt expecting that 2 happen......me n my friends did take a few pics back in the day.......if you ever went on to bangedup.com or consumption junction and u saw a pic of a kid bout 18-19 passed out with his mouth open and this fat dude wearin a blue t-shirt teabagging him.......he had it comming.....all night he was talkin bout how he tea bagged shitload of girls.....and there he was 4 hours later passed out with 2 nuts in his mouth.....gotta love the irony
 

Descent

Hella Constipated
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#18
I don't like alchohol. It tastes like chemicals, and piss.

Now Pepsi Blue on the other hand :thumbsup: .
 

Captain 151

Seeped in a dry Merlot
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#19
Descent said:
I don't like alchohol. It tastes like chemicals, and piss.

Now Pepsi Blue on the other hand :thumbsup: .
I used to share those thoughts, until I found Jagermeister. And my life was changed for ever.

I know you are only 16 or so, so wait 5 years to do this. Once you legally can, pour a half a can of redbull in with 1 shot of jager. It's like candy.
 

bigck3000

The Iron Lung
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#20
jagerbombs!1!!!......I sincerely believe that jagerboms and tequilla were the bane of my entire weekend...I've never felt like so much shit before. Keep it Green Keep it clean kids.....weed is alot cheaper and gets you way more fucked up.