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I Hate Red Fire Ants!!!! .....NWS......

#1
Ok.... I went to Florida from the 13th to the 21st and while I was down there I went to this redneck karoke bar in Homosassa and I figured I wood have a about 3 Long Islands and acouple shots of Jose..... Well the problem with that is... I dont drink to often and I was pretty ****ed up at this point so the redneck girls were looking pretty good...
So I started to talk to this one girl (read slut) she had just turned 21 the week before and she was really drunk well we got to talking and of course it turned to sex.. Well she asks me if I ever ****ed a chick with a pierced clit before I told her no... She said she got her clit pierced about a month ago and she hasnt ****ed a guy with it yet..
Well of course I was feeling pretty good since I knew were this was going so we talked a lil bit more and next thing I know she is dam near dragging me out of the bar we go behind the bar and start messing around. She looks me in the eye and says that she had the intention to make sure she got laid tonight and said if I didnt **** her right then and there she was going to go back in the bar and tell everyone in the bar im gay and then find someone else to ****.... Well needless to say i was ****ing invincible so I said **** yea I will **** the hell outta ya
So I drop my shorts and and take her clothes off and we start going at it... She asks me to go down on her and I new she was a whore so I said no I cant she asked why I said I was allergic and my lips swell up like a hippo.. She bought it... Now remeber we are outside behind a bar at night...
So Im ****in bangin the shit out of her and I start to feel somthing wierd so I ignore it for a few minutes but now its starting to hurt a lil bit kind of sting so I stop I look down and its dark out but I can see because of the parking lot lights and what do I see.... Both my ****in legs and my dick covered with these ****ing little biting red fire ants.. and she is also covered but I think some ended up in her cunt too she was diggin away at her shit... I mean damn near fisting her self.... I ran over to the side of the bar and sprayed my self down with a garden hose.... Holy shit was that water ****ing cold... i turn around and she was leaving I called out her name and she said she was to embarased to talk to me and left.... I will post more as I remeber.

later



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Note: This post may contain misspellings, grammatical errors,
disorganized sentence structure, or may entirely lack a coherent
theme. These elements are natural to my process of writing, and will
only add to the overall beauty of the post. :mad: :D
 

Jung

???
Premium
13,998
2,267
487
#2
I think I just got fired because of this post. It's too NWS. :(

That story sound, um... weird at best. LOL, if it really happened though. Please keep us informed.
 
#3
someone told me i could get sick from the ant bites.....

i still cant believe i was fucking some drunkass redneck whore on top of a fucking fire ant hill .......

wtf




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Note: This post may contain misspellings, grammatical errors,
disorganized sentence structure, or may entirely lack a coherent
theme. These elements are natural to my process of writing, and will
only add to the overall beauty of the post.
 

CopyLifted

Funnier than a 5th grader
4,790
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0
#4
Fuck man, what's with all the *****'s ?

The ants got more play then you. :cool:
 

gehtfuct

HuGE
Staff
9,351
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#5
MotherFUCK! What the FUCK does FUCKin' NWFUCKin' S FUCKing mean?
And why in the FUCK is this FUCKtard using all these FUCKin' (****) all the motherFUCKin' time? WTF?!
 

Fugly

Tenderony
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#7
Thats awesome. In all my of debauchery I don't have a story to top that. That sucks so hard. LOL
The worst part is when they puss up. Wait till that happens.
 
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#8
well.. at least people wont think youre gay.. just.. handicapped
 
#9
.... what the fuck do mean... ya got me worried

Fugly said:
Thats awesome. In all my of debauchery I don't have a story to top that. That sucks so hard. LOL
The worst part is when they puss up. Wait till that happens.
:confused:

ya got me worried

:confused: :question:
 

Eat_Kal

Banned - What an Asshat!
48
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#10
lmfao! good luck to u man youll probably need it
 
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#11
ANTS ANTS and more ANTS

ants are so fun to play with
all you have to do is hold a magnifing glass above their hill.
so fun