You clusterfucked, baboon-fondling, shit-slurping, dick-sucking, penis-chewing, shit-brained shithead! You are an abominably cretinous idiot and a loathsome, grudge-festering plague of grief.
When I want your monkey-brained opinion I'll rattle your cage, okay? If you're going to say something that ignorant, you could at least fake a stroke. If you knew what you're talking about, you'd be dangerous. How true is Stanislaw J. Lec's famous remark: "Every now and then you meet someone whose ignorance is encyclopedic."
Calling you dull is a gross underestimation of just how tedious you are. You have the personality of a damp sponge and the appeal of a moldy sweat sock. Any friend of yours is a lousy judge of character. Seriously, I've come across decomposing dog carcases that are less offensive to the senses than you are. Maybe you wouldn't come across as such a jellyfish-sucking mental midget if you weren't an 'idiot savant' without the 'savant' part; if the chief excitement in your meaningless life wasn't spotting people who are fatter than you are, or if you didn't have a face so ugly that even your mother didn't know which end to put the diaper on. Who am I kidding? You would.
Maybe you wouldn't be such a Jerk-In-The-Box if you weren't so stupid that even single-celled organisms out score you in IQ tests; if your weren't so grossly fat that you have to put your belt on with a boomerang, or if you didn't have a face that would give Freddie Kruger nightmares. Nah, of course you would.
There. I feel better now that you've gotten to know me a little.
Love, sofaking
When I want your monkey-brained opinion I'll rattle your cage, okay? If you're going to say something that ignorant, you could at least fake a stroke. If you knew what you're talking about, you'd be dangerous. How true is Stanislaw J. Lec's famous remark: "Every now and then you meet someone whose ignorance is encyclopedic."
Calling you dull is a gross underestimation of just how tedious you are. You have the personality of a damp sponge and the appeal of a moldy sweat sock. Any friend of yours is a lousy judge of character. Seriously, I've come across decomposing dog carcases that are less offensive to the senses than you are. Maybe you wouldn't come across as such a jellyfish-sucking mental midget if you weren't an 'idiot savant' without the 'savant' part; if the chief excitement in your meaningless life wasn't spotting people who are fatter than you are, or if you didn't have a face so ugly that even your mother didn't know which end to put the diaper on. Who am I kidding? You would.
Maybe you wouldn't be such a Jerk-In-The-Box if you weren't so stupid that even single-celled organisms out score you in IQ tests; if your weren't so grossly fat that you have to put your belt on with a boomerang, or if you didn't have a face that would give Freddie Kruger nightmares. Nah, of course you would.
There. I feel better now that you've gotten to know me a little.
Love, sofaking