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(incomplete) short story with no name yet

Cutter

College Punk
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#1
wish i post this anonomyous, because im not all that sure about my writing.


Sounds of traffic where distant. He was taking the same alleyway he always took to get home to his shack somehow called a Apartment. Life sucked for Xavier, it was kickin him while he was down and pissin on him all at the same time, then came rent money, which he need now and had none. "God damn,why can't they put lights in alley, prolly walkin in some shit without knowin it." "I like it dark" "who the hell is that" Xavier said quickly. "just a vampire" the voice replied easy. "damn goths." As to think his night could'nt get any worse, least of his problems where goths pissin him off on his way home. "go back yo your Dungeons and dragons fag". "nah". "you sure?, no wands or firevalls are going to save you when i kick your ass". "yeh im sure" Xavier could'nt place where the voice was coming from the way the alley made it echo. "I'm haveing a shitty day, but its gonna get a whole lot better when i kick your ass". "doubt it" Once again the voice elluded him from where its coming from. "startin to piss me off little man" "oh i'm sorry" the voice said sarcastly". "thats what im gonna tell your mom when you don't come home to the basement tonight. show your self little bitch". "you sure you want that". "Yeh i do" All Xavier heard was a swoosh of a trench coat and a guy is in front of him.

"Neat trick, gonna have to learn that one" The man just stared him down. Xavier was a good sized man 6'2" 230lbs and played football in high school and all this man was as tall but did'nt look nothing but skin and bones in the dim light. "to hell with this" Xavier started to turn, but before he could , the stranger punched him square in the chest. he crumpled to his side lost for breath. Quickly trying to get back up, but stumbled backwards twards the alley wall landing in discarded chinese delivery boxes. The man walked forward, Xavier let loose with a haymaker punch to the guys jaw and connected. The guys face snapped to the right. Xavier wasted no time, letting loose all he had on the stranger. Who on turn took it all without flinching. Xavier backed off catching his breath and then bolted for the street. Without getting 5 stepsd the man was in front of him grinning. "god damn" Xavier tried the other way, didn't even get turned around and the man was there still grinning. Xavier just stared dumbfounded at the man, then he noticed that the Stranger's K9 teeth where longer and looked sharp as hell. "What.....the....ffuuuu..."Xavier didn't have a chance to finish. With speed like lighting the man speared headed him to the the grouind, knocking the breath from his lungs. The man tore at his neck straight for the juggular. Pain was unbearable, Xavier's world went black.


this is just a part of it, if you guys like it. i will post the rest i got written. Peace
 

meh_it_all

WTF.com Sexy Pimp-ette.
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#3
It did have a good start to it, maybe if you split it up a bit, and did the grammer, it would improve people to read it. well done though.