Inside im ugly
outside im alone
i can't feel this
no..i feel it all to well
i am burning....
this is utter crap. Lets take for a moment a day in my life. Cause you see sometimes i just wake up to sleep again. I have nothing to offer, nothing to give and yet how I feel like I take to much. Sometimes I find myself appolagizing when I know I was right. When I know it was not my fault or doesn't matter, just like im so ashamed I almost have to appolagize. Then this is where you end up. You realize I have never had fun or been happy to long. Maybe I just love being depressed, maybe I am just an emotinaly fucked up child from the wrong side of the tracks.
I can not write out my feelings anymore an emotional poetic flow for ya. Utter crap. I hurt. I fucking really fucking hurt. GOD DAMNIT TO THE 7th level of my own fucking hell. I didn't mean for shit to end up this way but who the fuck does. if i was just brave enough, just strong enough. I WOULD DIE.
I would kill myself. Somedays I think today will either be good or bad and I will smile... and then its like so empty there is no reason to smile. Half empty like the bottle of lord calvert, empty like the bottle of JD...oh boo fucking who I don't even give a crap about my life have the time. Why should anyone else. THis is not a life. A life is friends, people, smiles, pain, its sharing it with people.... and i am so lost... so utterly lost
confused... no
those words don't even reach the hollow depths of myself...there is no me. I don't know who i am, what i am, and where i am. I need help but the only one who can help is me. I can't i quite. I give up...
i don't know what i am loosing to...its myself...me....goddamn i am weak somedays. So weak...trying to be strong. Well fuck it. FUCK IT FUCK IT FUCK it..............................................................
I*EDITED* FOR MAKING ME LOVE YOU SO FUCKING MUCH. *edited*
I hate myself most of all... i don't know why... i honestly don't.... i am just sorry... i am so sorry i failed before i could even start... i am really sorry...
I need help.
outside im alone
i can't feel this
no..i feel it all to well
i am burning....
this is utter crap. Lets take for a moment a day in my life. Cause you see sometimes i just wake up to sleep again. I have nothing to offer, nothing to give and yet how I feel like I take to much. Sometimes I find myself appolagizing when I know I was right. When I know it was not my fault or doesn't matter, just like im so ashamed I almost have to appolagize. Then this is where you end up. You realize I have never had fun or been happy to long. Maybe I just love being depressed, maybe I am just an emotinaly fucked up child from the wrong side of the tracks.
I can not write out my feelings anymore an emotional poetic flow for ya. Utter crap. I hurt. I fucking really fucking hurt. GOD DAMNIT TO THE 7th level of my own fucking hell. I didn't mean for shit to end up this way but who the fuck does. if i was just brave enough, just strong enough. I WOULD DIE.
I would kill myself. Somedays I think today will either be good or bad and I will smile... and then its like so empty there is no reason to smile. Half empty like the bottle of lord calvert, empty like the bottle of JD...oh boo fucking who I don't even give a crap about my life have the time. Why should anyone else. THis is not a life. A life is friends, people, smiles, pain, its sharing it with people.... and i am so lost... so utterly lost
confused... no
those words don't even reach the hollow depths of myself...there is no me. I don't know who i am, what i am, and where i am. I need help but the only one who can help is me. I can't i quite. I give up...
i don't know what i am loosing to...its myself...me....goddamn i am weak somedays. So weak...trying to be strong. Well fuck it. FUCK IT FUCK IT FUCK it..............................................................
I*EDITED* FOR MAKING ME LOVE YOU SO FUCKING MUCH. *edited*
I hate myself most of all... i don't know why... i honestly don't.... i am just sorry... i am so sorry i failed before i could even start... i am really sorry...
I need help.