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life of a sperm

stinkyfingers

retarted since 1979
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0
0
#1
Can you imagine what it would be like to be a sperm? What a shitty existance. you would be detained like a gitmo terrorist until some jackass decided to release you from the testicle hotel. But get this you are not just put out to pasture, you are whisked away by an emotional tornado. shot out of a cannon if you will. Ripped from your easy chair while drinking a beer and watching the game. you go from having you whole life ahead of you to the doctor giving you at most 7 days to live.

once released you usually have one of three options. dying quickly on the klenex sahara becoming a crusty memory, being trapped in a rubber suit with a bunch of other asshole sprem who are only looking out for themselves, or swimming in a
acidic enviroment looking for the one house one the block that does not have the windows boarded up.

I can't belive that they live that life its like being a hobo without shoes or trashcans to eat out of. i think i will just stick to being a dick.
 

Josie

Nimrod's Daughter
24
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#2
I was a sperm once. Awe at my wonder.
 

Tostig

Paradoxasaur
8,339
43
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#4
I wasn't. I was grown in a laboratory at "The Shop" and placed among the population as part of an intricate plot to take over the world by replacing all tissue paper with 3 shells! MUAHAHAHAHA!
 
4,248
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#5
Can you imagine what this thread would have been like if you didn't have any hallucinogenic mushrooms to eat before you made it?
 

kiwi_chaos

Flame Bait
7
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#6
won the race

thats an enlightening story.. and i.. i was the one who won the race and found my house (however, the windows were meant to be boarded up). yes, you heard me. i was a MISTAKE. oh the horror.
 

Farceur

Philosophy Nazi
Premium
5,684
1,524
387
#7
Tostig said:
I wasn't. I was grown in a laboratory at "The Shop" and placed among the population as part of an intricate plot to take over the world by replacing all tissue paper with 3 shells! MUAHAHAHAHA!

nice demolition man reference...

anyways carry on with your sperm topic...
 

squeeze_me

Fuck me in the gotaz.
1,051
0
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#8
TheLampIncident said:
Can you imagine what this thread would have been like if you didn't have any hallucinogenic mushrooms to eat before you made it?
spot on spot on :thumbsup:
 

squeeze_me

Fuck me in the gotaz.
1,051
0
0
#9
stinkyfingers said:
Can you imagine what it would be like to be a sperm? What a shitty existance. you would be detained like a gitmo terrorist until some jackass decided to release you from the testicle hotel. But get this you are not just put out to pasture, you are whisked away by an emotional tornado. shot out of a cannon if you will. Ripped from your easy chair while drinking a beer and watching the game. you go from having you whole life ahead of you to the doctor giving you at most 7 days to live.

once released you usually have one of three options. dying quickly on the klenex sahara becoming a crusty memory, being trapped in a rubber suit with a bunch of other asshole sprem who are only looking out for themselves, or swimming in a
acidic enviroment looking for the one house one the block that does not have the windows boarded up.

I can't belive that they live that life its like being a hobo without shoes or trashcans to eat out of. i think i will just stick to being a dick.

your fingers do stink....... they cant type a desent thread.
 

MaxPower

You're my number two
Staff
16,959
8,160
487
#10
Sounds like someone just saw a video in health class