I work for a well known wireless phone company. Let's call them Bubbles Wireless.
Some of the Bubbles Wireless (BW for short) customers suck!!!!!
Dear Bubbles Wireless Customers...
Let me explain something about your wireless service. I am doing this in an open letter because hopefully this way you won't fucking interrupt me!!! You received some important literature with your cell phone when you got it. If you read it cover to cover like you were told to by some large letters on a piece of paper on the outside of the plastic that held the users manual and welcome guide then you would know the following information...
1 - Your Equipment Warranty is held through the manufacturer. I don't care if it is Nokia, Motorola, LG, Kyocera, Panasonic, Siemens, Sony Ericcson etc. I don't care - ANY OF THOSE MANUFACTURERS HAVE WARRANTIES ON THEIR EQUIPMENT! It is listed in the users guide for that particular piece of equipment.
2 - Your contract with Bubbles Wireless states that we have NO warranty on your particular piece of equipment. Just because you bought the equipment from us does not mean that we made it. I don't give two shits that your phone says "Bubbles wireless" on it - it STILL was not manufactured by us and does not have a warranty through us. If you had even SKIMMED Your fucking contract you would KNOW that it has no warranty because it is in the section labeled... (wait for it)...... NO WARRANTIES.
3 - Your warranty covers you against manufacturer defects. It does NOT cover physical or liquid damage. That is not something that you can have covered under your warranty. Think about it? Why would a manufacturer agree to replace your phone for free because your butterfinger ass dropped the phone in a puddle? Why would they replace it if you spilled coke on it? Why would they replace it if you dropped it and now it has a purple splotch on the screen? Why SHOULD They - it's not THEIR fault - it's yours! YOUR responsibility.
4 - You do not get free equipment just for signing a new one year agreement. Period. America is the only nation in the world that gives free phones out for signing new agreements. I wish we didn't but Americans are greedy.
5 - I don't care if the person you were talking to before you were transferred to me had an accent or not - you wilL NOT talk to them like they are a dog with me on the phone.
6 - Yelling at me does not help the situation so kindly don't do it.
7 - Interrupting me doesn't make me see your point any clearer and does not increase goodwill towards you.
8 - Cursing at me or using profanity on the phone at all does not increase your stock in my opinion and will cause me to say "Sir I am going to have to ask you to watch your language." or if you use enough of it I might say "SIR! you will watch your language on this call." because I simply will not tolerate the lack of respect this indicates to me.
9 - Do not ask for my supervisor because quite frankly - I AM as high as the call can go and no one else will be able to assist you any differently than i am. Trust me - I just asked my supervisor if we could credit you 100.00 because I feel you deserve it and she said no.
10 - Don't you dare call right back and try to lie about me to my co-workers. We are a very tight knit group and we hear each other's conversations. I heard Roberts conversation 10 minutes ago sir, He did not call you names at all, how did i hear it? I SIT RIGHT BESIDE ROBERT!
11 - Explaining your situation 900 times is not going to make me suddenly see the light and grant you your way. If I have told you 'no' I am not going back on my word even if i want to. EVEN if i change my mind and decide that you deserve what you want - i'm not doing it. I refuse to change my mind verbally once i have made a stance.
12 - Don't ask me to waive a fee that is a valid charge. I will argue you to the death about it - i won't waive it.
13 - Don't treat me like i'm stupid, I have a Bachelor's degree and am working on my masters degree.
14 - Don't try and tell me that I can just break policy with my company just because you are a stock holder. Even if you are the majority holder (and i don't think you are because if you were you could purchase another phone instead of bitching at me) I'm not breaking the policy for you. I would not break the policy for a co-worker or even my brother who is a Bubbles Wireless customer.
15 - If you don't speak english - please have someone available who does speak english. I am not able to speak polish, italian, french, chinese, japanese, tagalong OR ANY LANGUAGES OTHER THAN SPANISH AND ENGLISH!
16 - I make barely over 8.00 an hour. Do you really think that is enough money to put up with your abuse? no? Then shut the hell up, sit the hell down and stop being a pain in my ass.
17 - If i tell you something, don't hang up and call right back to get another supervisor and ask the same damn question. That's really stupid and it wastes our time and chances are you will get me again.
In closing I do want to tell you that the nicer you are to me, the greater the chance i will bend rules for you.
thank you for your time, and attention.
Some of the Bubbles Wireless (BW for short) customers suck!!!!!
Dear Bubbles Wireless Customers...
Let me explain something about your wireless service. I am doing this in an open letter because hopefully this way you won't fucking interrupt me!!! You received some important literature with your cell phone when you got it. If you read it cover to cover like you were told to by some large letters on a piece of paper on the outside of the plastic that held the users manual and welcome guide then you would know the following information...
1 - Your Equipment Warranty is held through the manufacturer. I don't care if it is Nokia, Motorola, LG, Kyocera, Panasonic, Siemens, Sony Ericcson etc. I don't care - ANY OF THOSE MANUFACTURERS HAVE WARRANTIES ON THEIR EQUIPMENT! It is listed in the users guide for that particular piece of equipment.
2 - Your contract with Bubbles Wireless states that we have NO warranty on your particular piece of equipment. Just because you bought the equipment from us does not mean that we made it. I don't give two shits that your phone says "Bubbles wireless" on it - it STILL was not manufactured by us and does not have a warranty through us. If you had even SKIMMED Your fucking contract you would KNOW that it has no warranty because it is in the section labeled... (wait for it)...... NO WARRANTIES.
3 - Your warranty covers you against manufacturer defects. It does NOT cover physical or liquid damage. That is not something that you can have covered under your warranty. Think about it? Why would a manufacturer agree to replace your phone for free because your butterfinger ass dropped the phone in a puddle? Why would they replace it if you spilled coke on it? Why would they replace it if you dropped it and now it has a purple splotch on the screen? Why SHOULD They - it's not THEIR fault - it's yours! YOUR responsibility.
4 - You do not get free equipment just for signing a new one year agreement. Period. America is the only nation in the world that gives free phones out for signing new agreements. I wish we didn't but Americans are greedy.
5 - I don't care if the person you were talking to before you were transferred to me had an accent or not - you wilL NOT talk to them like they are a dog with me on the phone.
6 - Yelling at me does not help the situation so kindly don't do it.
7 - Interrupting me doesn't make me see your point any clearer and does not increase goodwill towards you.
8 - Cursing at me or using profanity on the phone at all does not increase your stock in my opinion and will cause me to say "Sir I am going to have to ask you to watch your language." or if you use enough of it I might say "SIR! you will watch your language on this call." because I simply will not tolerate the lack of respect this indicates to me.
9 - Do not ask for my supervisor because quite frankly - I AM as high as the call can go and no one else will be able to assist you any differently than i am. Trust me - I just asked my supervisor if we could credit you 100.00 because I feel you deserve it and she said no.
10 - Don't you dare call right back and try to lie about me to my co-workers. We are a very tight knit group and we hear each other's conversations. I heard Roberts conversation 10 minutes ago sir, He did not call you names at all, how did i hear it? I SIT RIGHT BESIDE ROBERT!
11 - Explaining your situation 900 times is not going to make me suddenly see the light and grant you your way. If I have told you 'no' I am not going back on my word even if i want to. EVEN if i change my mind and decide that you deserve what you want - i'm not doing it. I refuse to change my mind verbally once i have made a stance.
12 - Don't ask me to waive a fee that is a valid charge. I will argue you to the death about it - i won't waive it.
13 - Don't treat me like i'm stupid, I have a Bachelor's degree and am working on my masters degree.
14 - Don't try and tell me that I can just break policy with my company just because you are a stock holder. Even if you are the majority holder (and i don't think you are because if you were you could purchase another phone instead of bitching at me) I'm not breaking the policy for you. I would not break the policy for a co-worker or even my brother who is a Bubbles Wireless customer.
15 - If you don't speak english - please have someone available who does speak english. I am not able to speak polish, italian, french, chinese, japanese, tagalong OR ANY LANGUAGES OTHER THAN SPANISH AND ENGLISH!
16 - I make barely over 8.00 an hour. Do you really think that is enough money to put up with your abuse? no? Then shut the hell up, sit the hell down and stop being a pain in my ass.
17 - If i tell you something, don't hang up and call right back to get another supervisor and ask the same damn question. That's really stupid and it wastes our time and chances are you will get me again.
In closing I do want to tell you that the nicer you are to me, the greater the chance i will bend rules for you.
thank you for your time, and attention.
