WTF ... IS WTF!?
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Made an Ass of myself today

So today I was out and about, tending to my usual business. Went to the gas station, stood in line in front of a bunch of people....went to my crazy doctor's office and stood in line in front of a bunch of other people. A few guys at the doctor's were giving me looks, but I just assumed they were crazy. :happysad:

Then I got to work, went into the bathroom. I pulled my pants down and staring right back at me was a huge split in the seat of my pants. It's not really that noticeable at first, but if I tug up on my pants anyone behind me is gonna see cheek (I'm not wearing underpants). :redface:

Now all I can wonder is: how many people saw my ass today? Did I hike my pants up at any point while I was in line? I can't remember. How fucking embarASSing. :eek:


but you're a woman, it was probably the highlight of the day for most of those men. you should be happy you brought a little happiness to so many.


So the question is, do you ever wear underpants? 'Cause I think with girls it's 50/50. I do, some of my friends don't.

That happened to this girl I was seeing. Apparently she was walking down the street and didn't realize 'til she got on the bus that her side got torn. Honestly, wish I was there. She didn't wear underpants either. (sigh)


Shrug it off, it's all good.

That reminds me of this awful story I read once in the Village Voice or something. I was a teenager and well, I'm reading the paper and there are people writing their most embarrassing moments right?

Well this woman, now I don't understand how this happened but it's pretty gross and haunts me to this day just thinking about it....anyway this woman is wearing shorts and is standing on line at the bank. People are looking at her funny, and well long story short, she looks down and realizes that her maxi pad came out of her underwear and fell on the floor for all to see.

At least you weren't her.


From appaled to applauding, controversy.
:rotflmao: Such a shame I missed it!

How did work take your new commando approach? Get a raise? :lol:


Oh that's nothing. Many moons ago, I was in Cali. Pretty much just fucking off and having no particular reason for being there other than just being there. Anyhoo....Santa Monica Beach- Twas a balmy sun shiny day. I was just loafing about laying on the sand looking to the surf coming in. I glance over to my right to see two fine young females walking along the water. Thinking nothing of it, I watch them move along. Suddenly, they stop in front of me about fifty or so feet. Thinking that they were admiring the handsome man that I am; I look to them and smile as they giggle to themselves.

A friend of mine that I was bumming with had come strolling from dicking off from further down the beach. I said to him, "Dude. Check it out. Those chicks are scoping me out." Andy calmly looked over to the girls off in the distance, and then looked to me and replied, "No they're not. Your balls are hanging out of your shorts." Humbled, I turned over, checked my sack, and fell to sleep on the beach for three hours and was subsequently burnt to a crisp. Der!~

Consider yourself lucky. It could've been worse.