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My turn to get a ticket

Nunzii

®åvïñg §hëêþðhò£íç
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#1
I was driving to work today and there was a truck in the oncoming lane who hit a Blue Jay. The Blue Jay then hit my windshield and got stuck in that little place where the windshield wipers park.

So there I was, freaked out that this happenned, and the little fucker was still alive and was frantically flapping his wings, but was stuck in that little space, so I figured that I'd put the wipers on to flip him out of there. Anyway, it worked, but instead of flying away, he went smack into the police car that was behind me.

The fooking cop gave me a ticket - for flipping him the bird!


















:thumbsup: :D
 

skwabari_shtcak

sugar daddies welcome
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#2
That has got to be the funniest thing I've heard all day. It's almost as bad as my friends and I driving around town with corn cobs tied to the bumper while trolling for pigs. And when we got pulled over, we all hollered," Got one." I know, bad, but what can I say, I never said I was a good girl.
 
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#3
Nunzio said:
I was driving to work today and there was a truck in the oncoming lane who hit a Blue Jay. The Blue Jay then hit my windshield and got stuck in that little place where the windshield wipers park.

So there I was, freaked out that this happenned, and the little fucker was still alive and was frantically flapping his wings, but was stuck in that little space, so I figured that I'd put the wipers on to flip him out of there. Anyway, it worked, but instead of flying away, he went smack into the police car that was behind me.

The fooking cop gave me a ticket - for flipping him the bird!







:thumbsup: :D
hahaha that's damn funny. did you tell him "but sir, the bird, it got stuck in my wind shield wipers!!!"
 

gehtfuct

HuGE
Staff
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#4
Nunzio said:
I was driving to work today and there was a truck in the oncoming lane who hit a Blue Jay. The Blue Jay then hit my windshield and got stuck in that little place where the windshield wipers park.

So there I was, freaked out that this happenned, and the little fucker was still alive and was frantically flapping his wings, but was stuck in that little space, so I figured that I'd put the wipers on to flip him out of there. Anyway, it worked, but instead of flying away, he went smack into the police car that was behind me.

The fooking cop gave me a ticket - for flipping him the bird!
:thumbsup: :D
That's nothing. I ran over an old ladies cat the other day, and SHE was arrested.

Anyhoo, I was on my way to work the other day, when I zipped past a state cop. I was looking in my mirror for the peckerhead to pull onto the road after me. Just as I looked up, a stupid fuckin' cat darted out in front of me. I didn't have time to dodge the little fucker. Buy the time I had jerked the wheel, the little pussy was tasting rubber. (relax Max) Anyhoo, I pull over to see if the fucker was jammed in my wheelwell or not, some old lady comes screaming to the street. "Max!" Yes, the cat's name is Max, I shit you not. Anyway, I'm needing to geht my ass to work, so I offered some sort of restitution. The woman looked at me like I was crazy, as If she didn't need a reason to go buy more wine, but she took the fifty anyway. Just about that time, fuckin' Barney Fife shows up. He slaps the cuffs on the old lady. She looks to him with her sexy hangover gaze and asked what she was being charged with. The cop replies- "For selling your pussy."

I shit you not man.
 

Nunzii

®åvïñg §hëêþðhò£íç
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#5
ahhh i see you found meh cat...slighty photoshoped of course with the pirate theme :thumbsup: :thumbsup:
 

bombchu

b-o-n-e-r
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#6
That's a lame reason to get a ticket...

What kind of ticket was it? "Frightening Police Officer" ?
 

LiberatioN

Trance Addict
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#7
Cops will ticket you for just about anything these days...I'd be so pissed if I got a ticket for that. How could you have controlled it? Seriously..
 
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#8
Both of those were hilarious. I got a ticket for attempted vandalism once, the cop said I was trying to break the stairs of a bank. What happened was me adn my friends were jumping the stairs with our bikes. So after she gave me the ticket I said Jesus lady I know I'm fat but I don't think I could break concrete stairs. I found out later the cop was my moms friend.
 

RageAgainst

Chaotic Neutral
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#9
gehtfuct said:
That's nothing. I ran over an old ladies cat the other day, and SHE was arrested.

Anyhoo, I was on my way to work the other day, when I zipped past a state cop. I was looking in my mirror for the peckerhead to pull onto the road after me. Just as I looked up, a stupid fuckin' cat darted out in front of me. I didn't have time to dodge the little fucker. Buy the time I had jerked the wheel, the little pussy was tasting rubber. (relax Max) Anyhoo, I pull over to see if the fucker was jammed in my wheelwell or not, some old lady comes screaming to the street. "Max!" Yes, the cat's name is Max, I shit you not. Anyway, I'm needing to geht my ass to work, so I offered some sort of restitution. The woman looked at me like I was crazy, as If she didn't need a reason to go buy more wine, but she took the fifty anyway. Just about that time, fuckin' Barney Fife shows up. He slaps the cuffs on the old lady. She looks to him with her sexy hangover gaze and asked what she was being charged with. The cop replies- "For selling your pussy."

I shit you not man.
You're shitting me.

Can't sell your pussy in the streets, har har