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ow...blue balls make me want to puke

L

LewdM@thew

Banned - What an Asshat!
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#1
Blue ballz sukkk. Ok let me shed some light on the situation: Ive been with this girl for about a month or so and weve had A LOT of sex (current record: 8 times within 24 hours). Anyways, we can only fuck when no one else is at the house cause her brother (my friend of 4 years) always tries to pop in or bother us when we try to get it on. Also, her mom never really comes over to the house (she lives in a different house), but lately she has also been conveintly visiting us when we try to fuck. So lately, me and her will try to resist the urge to have sex when we are together and people are at the house, but that doesnt really work. We always end up grinding against each other untill we are on the brink of just ripping each others clothes off, but then we cant fuck cause shes all paranoid someone will bust in on us. So for a while, we tried driving to a seccluded spot and having sex in my car (dodge stealth). For those that dont know, there is so little space in that car that trying to have sex in it is much like a magician struggling to escape from being locked in a box while wearing a straight jacket. But we managed for a while...that is untill we were caught by a police officer late one night. Now we cant fuck in my car. The major problem is that when we fuck, we like to fuck for a good 45min-60min, which is long enough for her brother to make one of his routine check-ups. So one day at her house, we really wanted to ahve sex but people were there...so i gave her some oral action to satisfy her. But...she DID NOT RETURN THE FAVOR. And this isnt the first time this has happend, ive already gave her oral like 3 1/2 times with out her giving me head once. At first she said that she was against oral sex, that is until i showed her what exactly it was that she was trying to criticize.

My point is that i need advice on how to break the news to her that i have oral needs too, but i dont want to come off like an asshole or anything. Shes pretty religious (never would have guessed by the way she gets down) so shes sometimes touchy with issues like this. I just think i deserve head if i give her face...i mean...not only did i give it to her a few times before she even did it once, she also lost her virginity to me, so we are pretty close. Plz help somebody, i just got blueballs the other night cause she wouldnt help me out in my time of need. This will not continue.
 
Fire_ze_Missles

Fire_ze_Missles

Martha Fuckin' Stewart
#2
1,622
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LewdM@thew said:
Blue ballz sukkk. Ok let me shed some light on the situation: Ive been with this girl for about a month or so and weve had A LOT of sex (current record: 8 times within 24 hours). Anyways, we can only fuck when no one else is at the house cause her brother (my friend of 4 years) always tries to pop in or bother us when we try to get it on. Also, her mom never really comes over to the house (she lives in a different house), but lately she has also been conveintly visiting us when we try to fuck. So lately, me and her will try to resist the urge to have sex when we are together and people are at the house, but that doesnt really work. We always end up grinding against each other untill we are on the brink of just ripping each others clothes off, but then we cant fuck cause shes all paranoid someone will bust in on us. So for a while, we tried driving to a seccluded spot and having sex in my car (dodge stealth). For those that dont know, there is so little space in that car that trying to have sex in it is much like a magician struggling to escape from being locked in a box while wearing a straight jacket. But we managed for a while...that is untill we were caught by a police officer late one night. Now we cant fuck in my car. The major problem is that when we fuck, we like to fuck for a good 45min-60min, which is long enough for her brother to make one of his routine check-ups. So one day at her house, we really wanted to ahve sex but people were there...so i gave her some oral action to satisfy her. But...she DID NOT RETURN THE FAVOR. And this isnt the first time this has happend, ive already gave her oral like 3 1/2 times with out her giving me head once. At first she said that she was against oral sex, that is until i showed her what exactly it was that she was trying to criticize.

My point is that i need advice on how to break the news to her that i have oral needs too, but i dont want to come off like an asshole or anything. Shes pretty religious (never would have guessed by the way she gets down) so shes sometimes touchy with issues like this. I just think i deserve head if i give her face...i mean...not only did i give it to her a few times before she even did it once, she also lost her virginity to me, so we are pretty close. Plz help somebody, i just got blueballs the other night cause she wouldnt help me out in my time of need. This will not continue.
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Be a man, use your hand!

Just sit her down and tell her that you have your needs too, as you put it. she should understand, and try to assist you as much as she can, seeing how close y'all are and stuff. And by the way, who cares who comes barging in. They would learn a valuable lesson; one should always knock before entering.

Good luck. :thumbsup:
 
L

LewdM@thew

Banned - What an Asshat!
#3
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true cause i dont give a fuck if people are home, but she does so that means i guess i do give a fuck after all? Well, her bro knows exactly what hes doing, thats whats so fuck up about it. Ive been hanging out with her way more than him lately (im a border-line nympho) and i thinks hes jealous (he is my friend and all, but still)...he'll be downstairs watching TV while im upstairs fucking his sister, so i can understand how that might bug him when it happens every weekday. As for being a man and using my hand...nay. I refuse to use my hand when there is a perfectly good mouth available. My hand should be a last resort...last. I just want to be hella smooth with what i say. I need to use a very subtle touch when handling this situation. I want to come off as understading yet concernced and straight foward, but i dont want to come off as vulgar or harsh, nor overly concerned. I think i need to plan out what im gunna say, use specific word choices like "please suck". seriuosly tho, i have to be careful of what i say cause i dont know how shell react.
 
Havok

Havok

Mr. Ee
#4
10,772
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#4
If there are people in the house, take it elsewhere, or wait.

It's respectful to the rest of the people in the house.


(The bathroom also works very well.)
 
L

LewdM@thew

Banned - What an Asshat!
#5
241
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we tried to take it else where, and we got busted by cops. We try to wait, but shes as horny as me. We always end up on the having sex when were are together for too long. Id have to see her in like 10 minute increments if i were to have to wait. Shes too hot for me, i swear...i just cant help myself sometimes...most of the time. Im a slave to my hormones, i never wanted to be this horny but i bet god's laughing his ass off as we speak.

as for the bathroom, its not a matter of a locking door or anything, its just the fact that because of past incedents, she doesnt want to have sex unless she knows we wont be interupted. I wish i had a van...or an occasional blow job. Or an occasional blow job while in a van. :thumbsup:
 
Havok

Havok

Mr. Ee
#6
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LewdM@thew said:
we tried to take it else where, and we got busted by cops. We try to wait, but shes as horny as me. We always end up on the having sex when were are together for too long. Id have to see her in like 10 minute increments if i were to have to wait. Shes too hot for me, i swear...i just cant help myself sometimes...most of the time. Im a slave to my hormones, i never wanted to be this horny but i bet god's laughing his ass off as we speak.

as for the bathroom, its not a matter of a locking door or anything, its just the fact that because of past incedents, she doesnt want to have sex unless she knows we wont be interupted. I wish i had a van...or an occasional blow job. Or an occasional blow job while in a van. :thumbsup:
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Or an occasional blowjob in a movie theatre. :thumbsup:
 
G

gurlgonewild

Was machen Sie?
#7
1,086
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#7
this is what you should do...
if you want her to put it in her mouth and she doesn't want to, its probably b/c she's inexperienced, scared, etc
so! you have to either do it really quickly like in the heat of the moment or you have to do it slowly, a little at a time.

in the heat of the moment, you could whip it out, start playing w/ it while she's looking, MAKE SURE SHE IS WATCHING, and suggest to her how sexy, how much of a turn on it would be for her to go down on you, etc. or you could wear her down s.l.o.w.l.y. guess which one i'm in favor of? LOL

anyways, if she ever does put it in her mouth...
you must reward her extra special w/ really amazing sex.
like a mind game. you give me head-you get to cum many times more than normal.
even if you have to slow down or lower the degree of your performance...
till she gets the picture. and eventually she will or she'll just tell you flat out, "i'm not going down on you anymore"

shit this is getting pornographic! ps make sure she is very hot & horny, its just easier.
 
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LewdM@thew

Banned - What an Asshat!
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((((GOOD NEWS EVERYBODY)))))-kinda graffic...just a warning

well, this three-day weekend it happened, thrice. On saturaday I took her out to see "meet the fockers" and afterwards i brought her back to my house. I had my room all set up with candles and shit (those little candles that float in water, ya know) and i gave her a full body sensual massage...one of which she had to be naked for, of course. By this time she was dripping and ready to go...so i fucked her pretty hard and accurate (been studying the kama sutra with her...bought it for her for christmas)...but, while in the midst of a tantric technique (shallow penetration to isolate g-spot stimulation [/random comment]) i pulled out an began to tease her with my cock. Like i would use it to stimulate her clit. I got her to beg me to fuck her, and i whispered in her ear to suck my dick...who knew that all you had to do was ask?? Anyway, she went down on me and it was heavenly...like i was having a religious experience or something. I fucked her good afterwards...a few times then we went to bed (New record: 13 times within 24 hours, yay...hadnt fucked her for three days prior, so...) That morning we woke up and took a shower together, i cooked her breakfast...then hooked her up with a little somethin somethin involving a slice of mango and a can of whipped cream :lick: ...she was happy. So she tied my hands up to my futon with her scarf and blew me again...except this time she teased me (whata girl :thumbsup: ) but she eventually took it like a champ, im so proud. Blah blah blah, sunday consisted of sex, naps, and food. But the next morning, after i made her breakfast and gave her an other massage for such a good weekend, she sucked my dick for like a good hour to an hour and a half...she had me shooting blanks by the time she was done with me :p . Anyways, that was my weekend. Im so happy i could like...i dunno...do something good...for like a stranger or somethin?

wOot, NEW RECORD!!! hahaheh hell yeah bitches :jig:
 
C

Captain 151

Seeped in a dry Merlot
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4,261
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she blew you after you fucked her? So your chick likes the taste of her own vaginal juices? YOUR STORY IS RIDDLED WITH HOLES!

I meant that as a pun.

Nice girl.
 
ChilianFuckFace

ChilianFuckFace

Banned - What an Asshat!
#10
2,186
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#10
Now try to see if she will let you in the back hole... hahaahahahaha :thumbsup:
 
L

LewdM@thew

Banned - What an Asshat!
#11
241
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#11
oh my, it'll be a while before that happens...i think. Ive already asked her if shed ever try it, and she said that she didnt understand the point of it all. She said that she probably wouldnt ever try it. Translation: she would try it, but only under strict conditions...and lots of lube (no pun intended). Itll take some intricuit and persuasive dialog before it happens, and if it does happen i better make her cum untill she gets dehydrated. Its like an investment...ive gotta look out for future me. :thumbsup:

as for her tasting her own juices, yes. Yes she did. On more than one occasion, i might add. We ended up not using a condom for a good part of the last two days of the three day weekend, but we got those emergency controception pills so it all good. We decidied that if we were going to get the pills anyways that we should atleast get as many natural sessions in as possible before she takes them. So id say that 5-7 of the overall 18 times were nothin but skins.
 
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NaughtyGirl21

Formally Cuddles
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2,197
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#14
strange_booj said:
All of this in less then a month? Someone is a man whore...
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Silly noob, let me ask you a question. How the fuck is he a man whore when he is with on lady? Just because he fucks her so many times in 24 hours does not make him a man whore.

whore

Pronunciation: (hôr, hōr or, often, hoor), [key]
—n., v., whored, whor•ing.

—n.
a woman who engages in promiscuous sexual intercourse, usually for money; prostitute; harlot; strumpet.

—v.i.
1. to act as a whore.
2. to consort with whores.

—v.t.
Obs.to make a whore of; corrupt; debauch.
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S

Skitch0o0

Put it in MY butt...
#16
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#16
A) Pretty much ANY balls, no matter the color, make me want to puke.

B) Since when is a horny pre-pubescent something that anybody actually wants to hear about? First off, it´s nothing new. Secondly, nobody gives a shit.

Thanks for sharing.
 
G's-up

G's-up

Postaholic
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#17
Well maybe he didnt have blue balls.....I'd venture to guess they were just getting ready to drop........lol.... :)
 
E

Easty

Click click boom
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#18
damn cops, busting in on everyone's business. if it's secluded, who gives a shit what you're doing?
 
S

switch_scribe

dolor ex fides
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LewdM@thew said:
And this isnt the first time this has happend, ive already gave her oral like 3 1/2 times with out her giving me head once.
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This is something I must know. How do you give someone oral sex one-half of a time?
 
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