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Pessimism

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I am a pessimist, people say. I never worried about it untill recently. My heart started to feel heavy and overall i started to feel shitty. Doctors say its some kind of heart related issues. They started asking me if i have any problems at home or if anything bothers me n stuff like that (maybe they think im crazy or unstable?). Anyway ive got no personal problems except that i worry too much about things, about life and all. Before i do something, no matter if im good at it or bad, im preparing to fail. I dont believe in sucess. Generally because when i start doing something believing that i will do good, i always end up screwing things over. When i have opposite motivation result is usually good. But it starting to kick me now in my chest. When alot of things are happening i cant concentrate on all of them (i suck at multi tasking), and it drives me nuts. A notion of failure always haunts me, i cant sleep. Not getting enough sleep ruins my day, after eating i feel like im going to puke, pain in the chest.... I get irritated by little things and im getting more pissed every day. Sometimes i just want everything to go to hell, screw the sucess, if it requires such sacrifices, then fuck with it. Its not worth it.
 

Captain 151

Seeped in a dry Merlot
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#2
Small dosage of Paxil? :D

How old are you? That has a big impact on what decision you decide to make about this. If you are between the ages of 14-25, I suggest nothing. It's a period of "storm and stress" and its actually normal, or at least more normal than during other ages, to feel what you feel.

If you are over 25, there could be a chemical imbalance of some kind, though it doesn't sound to serious, or you could be just one of those kinds of people the dwell over things and always see the cup as half empty. My aunt is like that, but she grew up to have a family, 3 kids... etc etc.
 

Easty

Click click boom
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#3
Quote:

"Life's too short to be pissed off all the time."
-American History X

Be optimistic, dude! :thumbsup:
 
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#4
To be happy nowa days u need to be more or less sucessful, but what if its not coming to you. To accomplish something i always need to get out of my skin and it peals all juices of life from me. I never wanted to be an average american joe but it seems like this is where im going. I guess north american style of life is not for me. Thinking of moving to Mexico or tome other backwards country, just to prove myself that im not just like everyone else. I dont want no shitty job, a house, a van and a mail box stuffed with bills. Its do or die for me.
 

Captain 151

Seeped in a dry Merlot
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#5
Hey, whats so pessimistic about that?! You're just simply unsatisfied with the status quo, theres nothing wrong with that!! Hell, it's people who thought like that that faught to change society for the better, look at Martin Luther King Jr. Maybe I'm taking this one step further, but you shouldn't look at that as being "restless", you should be proud that you arent "settling".