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Put the Toilet Seat Down!

ron

Buster of Asses
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#1
Ever go to a friend's house and think everything is fine until his wife/girlfriend/(in)significant other returns from the bathroom bitching about him leaving the seat up? Yeah, I thought so.

Except for some Nancy-boys out there, men piss standing up. It's one of those things that evolved with the human race. Women evolved with tits, we piss standing up.

Sometimes men don't put the seat down. It happens. Based on the nearly universal reaction we get from women, you'd think that because of this seemingly insignificant event the world had stopped turning and fire was raining down from the heavens. Chaos Theory and the Butterfly Effect at work! Call the President, you had to put the toilet seat down to take a piss.

Get over it. If it's easy for us to put the toilet seat down, it must be equally as easy for you to do so. Men and women are anatomically and physiologically similar enough that the muscles in my arms work just like yours. My fingers possess the manual dexterity requisite to grasping the toilet seat and lowering it without getting my hands wet, yours must be, too. My mental faculties are such that I can formulate the operation without having an aneurism, you must be equally as capable. Women can do everything as well as men, except write in the snow, right?

In other words, and I'll try to use small ones, quit bitching and do it yourself. :mfinger:
 

screw_you_jack

Pig Tails and a Shotgun
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#2
ron said:
Ever go to a friend's house and think everything is fine until his wife/girlfriend/(in)significant other returns from the bathroom bitching about him leaving the seat up? Yeah, I thought so.

Except for some Nancy-boys out there, men piss standing up. It's one of those things that evolved with the human race. Women evolved with tits, we piss standing up.

Sometimes men don't put the seat down. It happens. Based on the nearly universal reaction we get from women, you'd think that because of this seemingly insignificant event the world had stopped turning and fire was raining down from the heavens. Chaos Theory and the Butterfly Effect at work! Call the President, you had to put the toilet seat down to take a piss.

Get over it. If it's easy for us to put the toilet seat down, it must be equally as easy for you to do so. Men and women are anatomically and physiologically similar enough that the muscles in my arms work just like yours. My fingers possess the manual dexterity requisite to grasping the toilet seat and lowering it without getting my hands wet, yours must be, too. My mental faculties are such that I can formulate the operation without having an aneurism, you must be equally as capable. Women can do everything as well as men, except write in the snow, right?

In other words, and I'll try to use small ones, quit bitching and do it yourself. :mfinger:

By the way, I put the toilet seat down after I take a piss.

this is something i have to agree with. IT's not that big of a deal, and i wan to slap most woman that complian about it.
It's a different story though when guys simple can't aim...... that can become a fatal problem..... :gun:
 

GottaHurt

Sexual Deviant
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#4
ron said:
By the way, I put the toilet seat down after I take a piss.
Pussy.

I put the lid down before I take a piss, that way their bitchy ass wive's are too shocked to even mention anything.
 

ron

Buster of Asses
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#6
screw_you_jack said:
this is something i have to agree with. IT's not that big of a deal, and i wan to slap most woman that complian about it.
It's a different story though when guys simple can't aim...... that can become a fatal problem..... :gun:
That's called "lack of dick control." It's like the time you stuck it in and spewed almost immediately. It gets better with practice.

Of course, some people are the mostly-hairless equivalents of lemurs, so who's to say? They just suck and won't ever get any better.
 

ron

Buster of Asses
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#7
GottaHurt said:
Pussy.

I put the lid down before I take a piss, that way their bitchy ass wive's are too shocked to even mention anything.
Damn, good strategy.
 

GottaHurt

Sexual Deviant
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#8
ron said:
That's called "lack of dick control."
Yea what guy is scoring a 100% on his aiming everytime he goes, he's either sittin' or spending way to much time "practicing".
 
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#9
GottaHurt said:
Yea what guy is scoring a 100% on his aiming everytime he goes, he's either sittin' or spending way to much time "practicing".
The point spread is about 3, right? Though you want to be careful on carpeted bathrooms - moldy, stale piss is just rank.
 

GottaHurt

Sexual Deviant
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#10
badassmtbiker said:
The point spread is about 3, right? Though you want to be careful on carpeted bathrooms - moldy, stale piss is just rank.
It rots the carpet too.....lmfao
 
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#13
GottaHurt said:
adding disclaimers to your post's now?
Well, only ones that may give the impression that my bathroom carpet's rotting. Lived with a friend in college and the entire house was carpeted. All bathrooms, the kitchen. Learned a good lesson about home ownership - hardwood, or linoleum in the kitchen and bathrooms is very, very good.
 

GottaHurt

Sexual Deviant
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#14
badassmtbiker said:
Well, only ones that may give the impression that my bathroom carpet's rotting. Lived with a friend in college and the entire house was carpeted. All bathrooms, the kitchen. Learned a good lesson about home ownership - hardwood, or linoleum in the kitchen and bathrooms is very, very good.
Tile, just hose it off and squeegie.
 

GottaHurt

Sexual Deviant
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#16
Serious though, I have tile throughout my house.Keeps it cool, and it's easy to maintain.
 

ron

Buster of Asses
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#20
GottaHurt said:
Yea, I'll be right over with my hose, I heard you got new carpet...
Nope, no carpet. Hardwood floors.

I'll warm up the enema bag so you can shove it up your ass without delay when you get here.
:mfinger: