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Other Randomness [2017]

Scooter

Roll me up and smoke me when I die.
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That daggone wasp was flying around in my kitchen! It got startled when I came home from work. I opened the door to give it an out option. Didn't take it, just kept flying around in the kitchen. I had to swat it down and smash it. It was about to lose its nest anyway, since it was all up in my doorway and the wasp needed to move on. Instead, it's lying dead on the floor.
 

gehtfuct

HuGE
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I used to troll tf out people on FB back in the day. So far I've won the FB lottery four times. I've been asked out by a Playboy super model and at least a half of dozen people trying to save mum's life. Oh, and I managed to piss off Fuckerburg personally.

Trolled tf out of them and accounts where closed. The Playboy model being a lie hurt deep. Real deep man. :sobs:
 

ThisIsBananas

Tough guy!
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I used to troll tf out people on FB back in the day. So far I've won the FB lottery four times. I've been asked out by a Playboy super model and at least a half of dozen people trying to save mum's life. Oh, and I managed to piss off Fuckerburg personally.

Trolled tf out of them and accounts where closed. The Playboy model being a lie hurt deep. Real deep man. :sobs:
Screenshots?
 

Scooter

Roll me up and smoke me when I die.
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I punched out from work and went upstairs to the bathroom because I had to piss.

Walked into the bathroom, washed my hands, stuck 'em under the hand-dryer, was ready to walk out, grab my coat and go home.

Said to myself 'You're a fucking idiot.'

Turned around, took a piss and washed and dried my hands again before leaving.
 

Scooter

Roll me up and smoke me when I die.
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Yeah, I guess that's what you could call it. It's been a frustrating couple of days. I'm aggravated, worried … whatever. I was a zombie by the end of today but I didn't do anything stupid.

A nice and kind old man, who knows Boss and coworker Dave, was shopping Wednesday and asked "Where's your help?" I said I had Joe with me and pointed to him. "Where's your boss?" It's Wednesday, it's his day off. "Where's Dave?" Dave will be here at noon. He has the closing shift. And we talked a little more.

Saw the nice and kind old man again today towards the end of my day. He said "Hey, you have help today!" I sulked past him and tried to mumble something friendly but I had to keep moving because there were still things to do and I needed to get the fuck out of there. 9 hours, going on ten hours, of work is enough. (OF work, not 'at' work)

Earlier in the day, the disastrous and struggling day, I decided that I needed to go across the parking lot to the liquor store for a bottle of tequila at the end of the day. And who did I see? That nice and kind old man, who had put his groceries in his car and was politely returning his shopping cart to the front lobby. We had a pleasant conversation (5-10 minutes) and he apologized for holding me up. It wasn't a bother at all because I like the guy. The only time when I'm in a hurry is when I'm at work, so it was totally chill to have a conversation with him in the parking lot.
 

CoprophagousCop

¯\_(ツ)_/¯
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(Note: This video does not seem to play in Internet Explorer, but it works in Chrome.)