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really need some advice

MsPunK

Tenderony
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#1
I knew this guy from school who i was quite good mates with. we both went through tough break ups and sorted eachother out when we were down. then one night we ended up sleeping together. it was great. we ended up goign out.im quite depressed atm and at the time i was drinking shitloads of whiskey havin loads of piss ups and getting stoned all the time. in this time i managed to totaly fuck things up with us, i never cheated on him but we were on and off all the time, and whenever i was drunk id end up pulling someone or doing summat really stupid. i basically played wth this guy s emotions and i dont even know why, because i was so drunk at the time , i dont know what thought processes made me end up doing all these stupid things. anyway, when it got to the point that we got drunk on my birthday, i asked him out again, then he found me five minutes later kissing someone else, i stopped drinking flat out. and from that day nothing stupid happened again. tht was five months ago now,and we are very close, it hasnt seemed to infuence our relationship until now. all the things i did at the beggining of the relationship is starting to affect my boyfriend. the other night he said he wasnt sure if we could work anymore. i know he still loves me and needs to forgive me in his own way, but i dont know how to act while hes feelign like this. we have something really special, we both know that, and i dont want to blow things by not letting him deal with this in his own way. he could end up breaking up with me, but if i knew how to deal with how he was feeling then id feel like i did everything i could. from a guys point of view, should i try to talk about this with him, or should i let him sort it out in his head? i know what ive written makes me seem like a total ho, but its so out of character for me and thats why i feel so bad about it.
 

leehype

drunk with a jeep problem
2,902
97
112
#2
I think you do need to talk to him. If you did do things when you were drinking, and now you not, belive me he should notice. Failed attempts at hooking up may be a deterint. But if your as close as you say you 2 are he should know your personality enough to know what leads to said situation. Telling him you quit drinking will not do anything, he will prolly need proof in time. Take it slow and dont ever forget why you like him. Make a subconsios effort to stay true, this will help.
 

Shadow_Demon

Lord of Shadows
82
0
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#3
well my adivce is to give him some time to work it out for himself. you see as far as I know when a guy does the same sorta thing to a lady she herself needs time to figure out whether or not it is worth it anymore. However due to the period of time that most of your unwise choices occured, he should, take into mind that neither of you had formally commted to the other. Then again he also must realize that now more then ever you are trying to show him your in "love", sorry I am not sure howelse to put it. But in all honesty all you can do is wait and if needed ask him after about a week or so what his feeling for you are. That will give you a good sense of what he is thinking of doing. And if all else fails I seem to be rather good at helping people out with thier relationship problems. Not sure why I am offering to help but if you need it message me.
 

Shadow_Demon

Lord of Shadows
82
0
0
#5
yes communication is a vital part of every relationship expesially in these times for her but think about it. If she does not give him some time then he could go off how he feels at the time instead of getting to know the entire situation and then her problems could get alot worse for her. Anyways we all know that any human whether it is a male or a female they are going to be rather mood at first and should be given some time to cool of and gather their thoughts.
 

Nailbomb

I'm just really nice.
4,475
2,799
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#6
Considering that stuff happened 5 months ago and he waited until now to bring it up, it's probably his escape plan. I really wouldn't be suprised if your next post talks about your break up.
 

ericman123

CEO of the internet
288
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#7
Nailbomb said:
Considering that stuff happened 5 months ago and he waited until now to bring it up, it's probably his escape plan. I really wouldn't be suprised if your next post talks about your break up.
Completly agree with you on this one.
 

MsPunK

Tenderony
241
0
0
#8
yeh, thats what i thought, that it was his escape plan. now just to make it worse, his housemate tried it on with me and has told him that it was me. im just waiting for him to say buh bye, even tho hes being really cuddly at the moment. thanks for your advice, i thought i was gonna get owned for being a drunken idiot.
 

lady victoria

Too old for this shit!
Premium
2,867
48
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#9
hey, we are all stupid somethimes but it really seems to me that you have your own issues, whatever they are and first of all you need to sort yourself out m8, dont mess with guy, not if you care until you have straightened yourself you. You have to figure out why you are acting like this.
 

evblazer

Fresh Meat
4
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#10
It may just be something that they didn't really get over.

Sometimes people like say myself for instance will accept something and try to deal with it myself and all goes great for a while. Say my SO breaking up with me for "exams" and then later I found out she dated someone else during that time. Then 5 months or 5 years later something possibly completely unrelated reminds me of it and I get on a big downer questioning it all so obviously I didn't get over it on my own.