WTF ... IS WTF!?
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The Exorcist 7: No, it's not pea soup and oatmeal!!

Blaze

Pyromaniac Extraordinaire
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0
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#1
So here it is...


A few months ago I bought a brand spankin' new car. I'm proud n' all see.... :D . Anyways, skip to two days ago. Saturday afternoon, after visiting a relative's house to grab left-over Thanksgiving tastey treats my mom asks me to drive her to the market. Whatever, fine. Went to the market. My mom goes, "Gawd, I feel miserable." "Did you take something before we left the house?" I asked. "Nope," she answered holding her head. "We'll be home in a jiffy," I assured her. "Oh! I need to go to Walmart, " she suddenly remembers. I told her she can write down what she wanted and I'll get it for her while she chills out in the car but she insisted that she had to find her items herself.

So we're done and are on our way home. She's in the passenger seat naggin', "Why can't you go any faster?" "Geez ma! Do you want me to get into an accident!" I barked, made a face, and turned up the music to tune her naggin' ass out.

OUT OF THE CLEAR FUCKIN' BLUE SKY SHE MAKES LIKE A DEMON POSSESSED AND FUCKING :sickpuke: BARFS ALL OVER MY ALL-LEATHER INTERIOR!!!!! FUCK!!!!!!! :(

All on the dashboard, all on the radio and CD player, all on clutch, all on the windshield, on the steering wheel, on the floor, on my big mac & fries, ON ME DAMMIT!!!!! WTF??!!!!!!!! Not to mention on the cieling, on the visor, on my glove compartment. And it came up in girgling waves of nausea - more like a friggin' tsunami! It gushed like a volcano and splattered like a fountain everywhere. Grabbing every napkin I had in the car, she tried to cover her mouth but with ABSO-FUCKING-LUTELY NO SUCESS, she hurled more on herself. And her only reply was, "I'm sorry." "Yeah, how 'bout that," I said through my teeth.

THE FUCK?! SORRY???!!!! BITCH, YOU FUCKIN' YACKED IN MY NEW CAR!!! I SMELL LIKE A FUCKIN' NUCLEAR HAZARDOUS CHEMICAL WASTE FACTORY(with a dash of befowled eggs, curdled milk, and a pinch of stomach acid joy juice for that hint of "ooo la la" WHAT THA FUCK!). Now, I tried several times, even in busy traffic, to pull the car over or stop cuz she was puking up left-overs. But she kept insisting on getting back home. Excuse me, but the hell with traffic....I figure the smart thing would be to stop, throw up the hazard lights, and let her chuck it up outside in the bushes. BUT NOOOooooOOOoooooo!!! :rant:

Now, because it's my mom I had to curtail my blazing anger and disgust cuz, to her, if I express such a reaction it would be seen as disrespect and we'd be arguing all through the week. A headache I don't need. Then she says I have no sympathy for a sick person. The heck?! I had to clean all that shit up. She goes, "I'll be there to help you in a minute." I say nothing and in a flash I changed my clothes, got a bigass bucket of water with a scrub brush, a bunch of rags, Pine-Sol and Oxy-clean spray and quickly cleaned it up.

I tucked her in to bed, got her some medicine, gave her some Ginger Ale, turned on some jazz and told her to rest. I have no sympathy? Bullshit. Thanks to her I get nightmares of her hurling up dinner to biblical proportions. Now I feel on edge Every time she asks me to drive her somewhere. Sheesh. The things you do for your parents.

Not to toot my own horn but honestly folks, she should be thanking me.
 

Tostig

Paradoxasaur
8,339
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#2
vomit/vomitting is the only thing that turns my stomach upside down. I'd have had to pull over because i'd be adding to the already considerable pile in the car.

however, i'd also have told my mother she's cleaning it up her damned self because even trying to clean it would have my calling for uncle ralph. that, and nobody should have to clean that up for someone else. that's just wrong. you need to tell your mother she's being a bitch and owes you big time.

she'll be mad for a while (maybe forever) but best thing i ever did was stand up to my mother. we get along well now.
 

littleone

the short crazy one
140
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#3
Gross. Anyhow, wow, how nice of you. Ask her what she would have done for you. If she adds anything, she obviously thinks you didn't do enough. If she says the same than ask why the hell does she think you don't have sympathy towards the sick? You're mother sounds like she's a bit on the psychotic side, doesn't she. Well, I hope she's fine and well?
 

aMeRiKhAn7

Had Enough?
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#4
If that was my mom I would of kicked her out of the car and let her fall into the road of incoming cars. :evil:
 
1,456
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#5
Oh man, that sucks. If it hasn't been dealt with by now, I'd say to take it to the cheapest detailing place in your area and have your mom pay for it.
 

Easty

Click click boom
5,564
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#6
Blaze said:
OUT OF THE CLEAR FUCKIN' BLUE SKY SHE MAKES LIKE A DEMON POSSESSED AND FUCKING :sickpuke: BARFS ALL OVER MY ALL-LEATHER INTERIOR!!!!! FUCK!!!!!!! :(

All on the dashboard, all on the radio and CD player, all on clutch, all on the windshield, on the steering wheel, on the floor, on my big mac & fries, ON ME DAMMIT!!!!! WTF??!!!!!!!! Not to mention on the cieling, on the visor, on my glove compartment. And it came up in girgling waves of nausea - more like a friggin' tsunami! It gushed like a volcano and splattered like a fountain everywhere. Grabbing every napkin I had in the car, she tried to cover her mouth but with ABSO-FUCKING-LUTELY NO SUCESS, she hurled more on herself. And her only reply was, "I'm sorry." "Yeah, how 'bout that," I said through my teeth.

Damn, did she even try the window?!?!
 

Blaze

Pyromaniac Extraordinaire
117
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#7
Unfortunately she didn't think about hanging her head out the window. Wish she coulda tho. Would've been a whole heck of alot easier to clean my car. So what, puke on the paintjob....whatever, wash it off, right? But not my mom - the chick continues to ralph on herself. Ewwww. I literally get scared when she wants me to drive her ass to the store for whateverthefuck and she has the nerve to make a face cuz I'm nervous with her in the car. paaaallllleeeeezzzzzzz! :hmph:

SHE DIDN'T EVEN KNOW SHE MISSED A SPOT! Yeah, bigass splatter of uppity-chuck on the cieling on the passenger side. Driving to work the following Monday I noticed it when I made a stop. My dad, thank the gods, cleaned it up. Can you believe this crap? She's got both a husband and daughter scubbin' puke for her.

Not makin' her out to be bad-mom material or nothing - it's just that I'd like a 'thank you' or something y'know? I know ya gotta respect your parents and all but they also gotta respect you. Dam, that comment from her pissed me off. I barf-party in my car made me mad, sure. But sayin' that I don't care is bullshit.