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The Women of Icarus

Icarus

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#1
Yes, yes, it's time for another one of my lengthy posts about women and highschool drama. Ready? Go!

H'okay. So we're gonna start at the beginning of the year. I am down about a recent break up. A bunch of girls I don't like (read: ugly) keep hitting on me. Besides my lack of attraction, I am not interested in pursuing a relationship with anyone at that point in time. Fast forward a few weeks.

I am pretty much over the girl I broke up with (this is a month or a month and a half after the break up). There is this wicked hot girl I don't know really well, suddenly she decides to jump on me one day and I get to know her better. We decide that we are married. So we're pretty physical but nothing really happens consistently, relationship still in its infancies when it's my birthday. She says "You're turning 17, right?" No, I'm 16 now, I say, and she gets this look on her face that spells doom to me. She is 17, going to be 18 soon, and every time she sees me for like a week she remarks how old she feels. She thinks she's too old for me, but I have dated girls war older than her, but how would I tell her that? "Hey, I've been with a TON of girls older than you!" That would be a disaster waiting to happen. We gradually get un-married.

During all this, a girl whose nickname is "Big Mac" (for obvious reasons) hits on me non-stop. She asks "loaded" questions and gropes and tickles me (which I am kind of uncomfortable with). She's nice and all but I'm not attracted to her, plus she is the ex-girlfriend of a kid that I hate. To date she is still hitting on me.

So. I spent a week or so pretty bummed. After that I had one of those legendary boys' night outs with my friends, and I felt over her. Now, there's this girl who is also really hot (but in a much different way). She is a few months younger than me (will be important later). She's quiet in class but she's bubbly, flirtatious, and rambunctious once you get to know her a little bit. We flirt constantly every day, this has been going on for two or three weeks. I don't know if I like her, but if I do it will be the first time I've EVER liked somebody younger than me. The closest I ever got was liking somebody a day older than me. This will be weird for me. Plus, she is kind of short and she has a very young-sounding voice, which adds to her seeming young.

During all of this, there is a group of girls I call the "squirrels", because they won't get off my nuts. Groping me, hitting on me, treating me like slutty man-meat (which I am not). I don't know what to do about the squirrels!

So... I guess the point of all this is... what the fuck would you do in my situation?
 

Brain Spout

Wizard No More
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#2
tell the squirrells you're gay, do the young chick or just tell the old chick she isn't that old.

EDIT: i'm winning
 

Icarus

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#3
The squirrels know I'm not gay because they have seen me with girls... doing the young chick isn't very easy because she's rich... problem with the "old chick" isn't that she's too old, it's that I'm too young, in her eyes.
 
#4
Alright. If you tell the squirells to fuck off, they might spread some rumor shit. So I think you should tell them that you aren't interested in them. Get away from the older girl and stay with the younger.


Oh yeah, I'm great.
 

Piro

From appaled to applauding, controversy.
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#5
i thought it would be obvious, say you're not available. can't get much clearer than that.
 

void

Banned - What an Asshat!
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#6
squirrels: they are revelling in making you uncomfortable, start calling them 'the squirrels' to their face, when they come down the hall shout out.. "it's the squirrel girls" or something, you'll only have to explain what that means once and they'll fuck off to someone easier to fuck with..

'old' girl: she's bowing to peer pressure, there's some unwritten rule that until a girl is 25 she can't date a younger guy without feeling like she's a joke.. it stems from the fact that girls mature sooner than boys and feel uncomfortable with any boy who isn't older than her..
forget her, you're up against hundreds of years of social conditioning.

younger girl: doesn't sound like you are too attracted to her.. reading between the lines you think she's a squeaky voiced midget right?
forget her, it's pointless trying with someone who doesn't turn you on. i had a fat gf once, don't know why but i let her chat me up and let her come home and she gets the clothes off and.. nothing, couldn't even pretend i had a hard on..
just stick to what you like, which sounds like it's older girls so i guess you need to start faking an ID.. ;)
 

Icarus

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#7
void said:
squirrels: they are revelling in making you uncomfortable, start calling them 'the squirrels' to their face, when they come down the hall shout out.. "it's the squirrel girls" or something, you'll only have to explain what that means once and they'll fuck off to someone easier to fuck with..
They don't know they're making me uncomfortable. They laugh at all my jokes, try to go out of their way to get me to notice them. They're all freshmen, by the way.

void said:
'old' girl: she's bowing to peer pressure, there's some unwritten rule that until a girl is 25 she can't date a younger guy without feeling like she's a joke.. it stems from the fact that girls mature sooner than boys and feel uncomfortable with any boy who isn't older than her..
forget her, you're up against hundreds of years of social conditioning.
I've always dated older girls, I'm mature beyond my years in social situations; unless you know me really well you won't see my immaturity.

void said:
younger girl: doesn't sound like you are too attracted to her.. reading between the lines you think she's a squeaky voiced midget right?
forget her, it's pointless trying with someone who doesn't turn you on. i had a fat gf once, don't know why but i let her chat me up and let her come home and she gets the clothes off and.. nothing, couldn't even pretend i had a hard on..
just stick to what you like, which sounds like it's older girls so i guess you need to start faking an ID.. ;)
I am attracted to her, like I said, she's hot. I don't think she's a squeaky voiced midget, just her voice and stature make her sound younger than she is (it's just kind of weird for me, not good or bad).
 

JLXC

WTF's Official Conspiracy Fanatic
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#8
Here's my comment on the whole thing. Icarus, you're not going to get attention like this when you get older. I'd say that you should do what you think is right. If you REALLY wanted the squirrel girls to leave you alone, you can accomplish that in many ways. They must think you're enjoying it or they'd probably stop. Date whoever you want, and try to have fun with it. You're way too young to get all serious. Just enjoy these times when there's girls all over, some of them wanting you, because it wont last and you'll remember these days as some of your fondest.

Also, don't judge girls based on looks (i.e. Ugly) because it's not the looks that make it fun, it's the attitude and the personality. Vapid good looking girls are a dime a dozen, train your mind to try and see what's in there.
 

Icarus

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#9
JLXC said:
Also, don't judge girls based on looks (i.e. Ugly) because it's not the looks that make it fun, it's the attitude and the personality. Vapid good looking girls are a dime a dozen, train your mind to try and see what's in there.
I won't date a hot girl with a bummer personality, either. Personality is important to me, as are looks.
 

Stardust

Being naked just feels so a-peeling
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#10
I'm 18..my bf is about 1½ year younger..and I couldnt care less..tell her to get over it and if she really likes you then something like that shouldnt go in the way of you having a great time and all that..and btw..I hate to say this but I look younger that I am and he looks older than he is..which is annoying sometimes..but my point is that if you like that older girl and she likes you then go for it and make her get over that whole "but I'm older" ask how much of an agedifference her father and mother has etc.. :) or then throw the "but demi Moore dates Ashton (or did..don't really know or care) and Ashton is reaslly young compared to Demi"
 

Icarus

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#11
I was sitting two rows behind the girl I used to be married to at a football game today. She was ignoring me. I don't know why. :thumbsdn:
 
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#12
umm, does anyone know if 30 year olds can go back to high school? you know, re-enroll... just for like some refresher courses and such?
 

Jiraffe

Domesticated Savage
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#13
Icarus here's my advice.

The Squirrel Girls: Tell them your not intrested ever. Explain it to them what ever way you chose. I always went heartless fuck because it detatched me from everyone in highschool(I'm not suggesting that to you though. In fact stay away from that path at all costs)

Older Girl: Find a way to make her feel young again. You know more about her then I do I hope so you'll figure something out.

Younger girl: or maybe a change of pace is exactly what you need stud. Maybe you should go younger for once so you can experience something new. As long as your comfortable or content with it do it.

That's all I can say Icarus. Its all kinda vauge but I think if you think about it you'll get it.
 
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#14
Icarus, man "YOU'RE NOT GOING TO GET ATTENTION LIKE THIS WHEN YOU GET OLDER"
Take those words to heart, and just have FUN! But do be careful! Watch out for those nasty stds, and we don't want any little Icarus Jrs running around (at least, not yet) :)