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thoughts of a small person

Stardust

Being naked just feels so a-peeling
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#1
Me and my bf had this "fight" today, about..me.
We go in highschool(?) 3years then graduate.. now when I began
Highschool..I was depressed and didn't take som many classes, now on the third year I'm in deep shit of not having enough classes.. so I maybe have to graduate on the fall or maybe the spring after my class graduates..and that has really stressed me out. I'm depressed, stressed because I wan't to try to get all the classes so I graduate at the same time.

So this me being often sad, depressed and negative about not graduating "in time" has teared the relationship a bit..or he doesn't handle all the negativity..which is fully understandable. But it makes me feel like the worst girlfriend ever and I'm even thinking of taking something that makes me mellow a pill anything that keeps me from getting all the negative thoughts. the stress(which causes the almost daily headaches, that are almost killing me) and hurting my boyfriend. Can anyone help me? because I'm really tired and sad..and I really really need your help...
 

littleone

the short crazy one
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#2
What do you want us to say? This "problem" to which you're asking a solution for seems to be "your problem." Internally that is. And perhaps your boyfriend needs to get into this as well. Tell him how you feel. And the next question would have to be, "Does he know?" If he doesn't, tell him right now.

But again, this seems like a problem only you can figure out. There seems to be more to it then you let on.
 
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#3
I am a big advocate on the seperation of sex and school. What I mean by that is you have to set some time outside of school to spend with him, and it has to be a you-and-he time, so no mention of school at all. I had this problem myself last year with my ex. We lived together. We go to the same University. The same faculty. The same program and classes. We even play the same bloody instrument.

So what I am saying is that if you make a special time outside of school with which to meet up, you may then be more concerned with spending a good time with him than your school work.
 

void

Banned - What an Asshat!
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#4
stardust.
i wish i could help more, you're a good person, you deserve a good life..

i've been to the bottom and i've been to the top. artificial and real.
i've lived in the sun in one big party full of beautiful people with all the potential in the world, and six months later i have had my head on the train track crying as the train came.. but.. i'm still here.
a lot of shit happens to us on this journey through life sister, a lot of beauty too.. we need to remember none of it is permanent and focus on the whole, the whole cycle of our life.. you're 18? i was 18 too.. since then i have been around the world twice and had over 20 lovers.. it was all good and all bad.. what i am saying stardust is, as long as you are here this time next year, and you do have control over that, you will be suprised at how different things are.. maybe you still won't be satisfied but hey.. being unsatisfied breeds action.

incase i wrote too much.. to surmise, you will be doing something different soon.

good luck to you and your boyfriend, you're young and shouldn't worry so much. :)
 
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#5
this is one of those situations where you can't accept the given destiny, and you just have to kick lifes ass and work your way around your problem.

do they offer summer school in finland? take it! do they offer online classes? take them! anyway to go around a problem, you take it, and beat the shit out of it!!@! :thumbsup:
 

JLXC

WTF's Official Conspiracy Fanatic
Premium
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#6
I'm going to generalize, I know the taboo of it!

Men like having girlfriends for Sex, and for company. If the man is getting sex, he can ease up a bit on the company. If you are not having sex, or at least giving him a goob BJ once a week( at least), then you have to be good company. Good company is easily defined as being fun to be around.

If you're not having sex with him, and you're not fun to be around, then you're not a good GF according to many many mens standards. Good luck!
 

Easty

Click click boom
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#7
dull_bullet said:
do they offer summer school in finland? take it! do they offer online classes? take them! anyway to go around a problem, you take it, and beat the shit out of it!!@! :thumbsup:
you beat me to it, but good advice nonetheless.

hope you feel better and find a way around it, star.
 

Stardust

Being naked just feels so a-peeling
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#8
thank you guys..you really helped me :hug2:
and sorry void and JLXC I can't rep you guys yet :happysad:
 

Easty

Click click boom
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#9
hey, anything for someone who admires me:thumbsup: :p
 

RetArt

A Rampant Vagitarian
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#10
Stardust. I know this might seem like a big problem to you now, but believe me, on larger scale it is not. When I gratuated, there were many in my class that did so in the following fall or spring. You might think you are losing some valuable time here, when you dont graduate after 3 years. I say it does not matter. Every boy/man has to take the army after school in Finland anyways, so even if it takes half a year longer for you to graduate, you´ll still be ahead of bout 50% of your classmates. I say take it easy, study hard and don´t panic

On a personal note, I had a friend who failed to pass the graduation test. At the same time he was experiencing some trouble with his girlfriend and his father. He also had an alcohol-problem.. So.. When we had our celebrations after passing the tests and graduating, he hung himself. We did not know until the following day, but it made many of us very sad and slighlty philosofical.

The bigger idea behind this text is, that you ought not to stress. Lifes rolls on. You can take summer courses (theremust be some at least nearby you) High school isn´t that serious after all. Life is.

In fact I´d like to graduate you for making this far. Finnish high school is certainly not easy. props
 

dustinzgirl

Banned - What an Asshat!
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#11
Dont stress it. But do tell your boyfriend how stressed you are, and that he needs to be more supportive of that. What kind of guy cant handle negativity? That is part of life, and of relationships. If he expects everthing to always be perfect then he is in for a big surprise, because life in general is rarely perfect or positive, and part of life is learning how to get through it with someone else when shit happens. I dont think that you rproblem is graduation, I think it is all the bullshti pressure these so called friends are putting on you.
 

Stardust

Being naked just feels so a-peeling
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#12
dustinzgirl said:
Dont stress it. But do tell your boyfriend how stressed you are, and that he needs to be more supportive of that. What kind of guy cant handle negativity? That is part of life, and of relationships. If he expects everthing to always be perfect then he is in for a big surprise, because life in general is rarely perfect or positive, and part of life is learning how to get through it with someone else when shit happens. I dont think that you rproblem is graduation, I think it is all the bullshti pressure these so called friends are putting on you.
You got it all wrong duztingirl..He IS supporting me, but it's alot of negativity sometimes and he has hard to handle it all( he has troubles in school too and sometimes maybe feels left out with his problem and it's just me me me. And I fully understand that, because when I get sad..it's hard for me to get happy again) SO he is supportive and my friends are too (or my friend) :happysad:
 

dustinzgirl

Banned - What an Asshat!
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#13
Stardust said:
You got it all wrong duztingirl..He IS supporting me, but it's alot of negativity sometimes and he has hard to handle it all( he has troubles in school too and sometimes maybe feels left out with his problem and it's just me me me. And I fully understand that, because when I get sad..it's hard for me to get happy again) SO he is supportive and my friends are too (or my friend) :happysad:
OK, I misread your post, so sorry if I was incorrect.
 

Sulik

I'm serious, no?
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#14
Will you graduate late? Or is it just a possibility?
 

Stardust

Being naked just feels so a-peeling
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#15
Sulik said:
Will you graduate late? Or is it just a possibility?
well Ill propably graduate later, if I work my ass off I have the possibility to graduate "in time"
 

Sulik

I'm serious, no?
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#16
So it's still possible to handle the matter :).

Don't wash time on bad feelings! You still have chances, and people around you are willing to support you! And it's nothing better than achieve what you want after non-stop efforts!
 

Sulik

I'm serious, no?
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#17
Personally I would love to assist my GF if she faces problems. Once of the reasons is to show her my enthusiastic love ^^
 

skully

GO BEARS!!!!
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#18
Dear Stardust

Welcome to the stress of school/college. What i could suggest is make sure you geht enough sleep. Most people think that the more you work and the less you sleep, the more work you get done. NOT TRUE. i am going to face the same problem in 2 years. I am taking 6 months off for the next 6 motns and then ill have to work my ass of for the nex 2 years to graduate in time.
If you sleep for around 7 hours a day, your work hours will be a lot more efficient. I recently had this lesson hammered into my head by my dad and trust me, its right.

Dont look at your relationship ina negative way. The more you feel like you are a bad girlfriend, the worsse and worse the rrelationship will become. If he is supportive its a great thing. If my girlfriend was going through a hard phase, I would support her regardless of the circumstances. Think that your relationship is good and just has some shotcommings. Try to see why there are shortcommings and then try to fix them . There isnt much that we can tell you to do because it all boils down to what you decide to do. I hope everything works out for the best.


:hug2:
skullmaster