WTF ... IS WTF!?
We are a collective of people who believe in freedom of speech, the rights of individuals, and free pancakes! We share our lives, struggles, frustrations, successes, joys, and prescribe to our own special brand of humor and insanity. If you are looking for a great place to hang out, make new friends, find new nemeses, and just be yourself, WTF.com is your new home.

Very, very few geeks who build their own machines have ever touched a girl's boobs.

Descent

Hella Constipated
7,686
165
157
#1
Breasts - Preferably rendered.

With this in mind, manufacturers such as Chaintech, MSI, and Gigabyte go out of their way to relieve many-a gamer's staggering erection while at the same providing them with multiple keyboard jizz stains induced by John Carmack's feminine side. The more you pay, the better the boobs. Well, except Chaintech. They put the same boobs on every box, and they are also my favorite choice for boobs, budget motherboards, and video cards. They make not only great bits, but great tits as well.


She may look cute, and I'll admit that Chaintech's shiny packaging with metallic boobs look great on a store shelf, but to be honest the fact that this bizarre hodgepodge $100 card has a 512MB framebuffer and runs off of AGP 8X tweaks my hardware "whatthefuckisthisbetterbuyonebeforeit'soffthemarketsoicanexperienceitfirsthandwowthat'scool" interest more than quality fapping material.

In any other case her boobs would be drawing me in. Cum to Butthead...Huh huh.

The MSI Tribeswoman is intended for jacking by MMO players who are too heavily in debt from paying for 20-plus monthly fees for 20-plus MMORPG's to afford a decent hooker without herpes. Of course, for the price of a 6800GT you could fuck 250 hookers in Thailand, minus airfare. But that never rings a bell with them.



Egad! Rings a bell don't it? Looks like the best part of this bitch slid down the crack of her mouse's ass and ended up as a brown stain on society!

Of course, by many geek standards she would be "hot." But the Jewish nose has to go, I don't think the Taiwanese know what they are depicting here, but since I'm 1/8th Arabian Jew and am in a "JewTalian" town on Long Island, I think there are racial tensions afoot out east.

As George Carlin once said:

"I've never fucked a ten. NEVER FUCKED A TEN! But one night, I fucked FIVE TWO'S! And I'll be damned if that don't count."

Except unlike Carlin, these geeks couldn't even score a two. More like a point five. Mrs. Brianna Pepper's springs to mind.

Sadly she wasn't available for an interview but her likeness is on this box!


Wow. That has got to be the FATTEST Japanese porn star I have EVER seen! This probobly appeals to the desperate lamer/furry demographic.

I didn't know there were fat fetishes in Asia. Hell, there are shit fetishes, foot fetishes, asshole fetishes, cuteness fetishes, pedo fetishses, and even fetish fetishes in Asia, but I NEVER knew that Asians enjoy porking a porker. That means it's being marketed towards Americans and they hate our fatness and are racist! DEATH TO ASIA! THEY POSESS WEAPONS OF ASS DESTRUCTION!

Well, I hope we learned something from this. If every one of us geeks started fucking and having little nerdlings, boobs would disappear from CompUSA. So don't fuck! The last thing we need are more Carmacks.
 

Nailbomb

I'm just really nice.
4,475
2,799
332
#2
Descent said:
So don't fuck! The last thing we need are more Carmacks.
That may be the best advice I've ever seen you give.
 

UberSkippy

a.k.a. FuckTheBullShit
7,529
63
142
#4
Holy freaking shit man....

I damn near wet myself laughing at this shit. The fact that you'd go to so much trouble to even write this (I mean typing it out was too much trouble) amazed me. But the "Jewish" nose comments... holy damn god... you are one of probabl 3 freaks that ever even got that idea. Even if it was a Jewish nose (and not just badly drawn) that wouldn't be offensive anyway.

This shit could have only been written by the commedic genius of either a lunatic or a retard... Oddly I find it amusing for far different reasons that I think it was intended.

Thanks man... I needed the laugh.
 

BklynCannonball

pffffffffffttttttttttt...
3,452
7
0
#5
Sigh

You guys are hopeless

Just go out and meet a girl already!

P.S. The real thing's better

 

Darklight

Oppressing your posts...
5,438
95
142
#6
nice tits bklyn... :D

oh and I built my own puter and I get laid quite often from my wife... tyvm..
 
11,074
726
382
#7
I haven't built my computer and haven't touched a boob. :happysad:
 

screwy

BIG BLACK DICKS
4,165
5
102
#9
How come Bkln doesn't have 187456 rep by now?
 

UberSkippy

a.k.a. FuckTheBullShit
7,529
63
142
#10
screw_ball said:
How come Bkln doesn't have 187456 rep by now?
Beats me but I'd like to see the rest of those assets!


I still don't understand how Descent was able to go from drooling over video card packaging to geeks don't touch breasts. Just another in a long series of wtf moments I geuss.
 

Jung

???
Premium
13,998
2,267
487
#13
Descent, this was actually pretty funny. Thanks for the laugh.


BklynCannonball said:
You seriously need some sun.
 

Nailbomb

I'm just really nice.
4,475
2,799
332
#15
BklynCannonball said:
Just go out and meet a girl already!
Something tells me the meeting wouldn't go well.

BklynCannonball said:
I'm keeping this in the quote because I know everyone wants a second look.
 

Descent

Hella Constipated
7,686
165
157
#16
Thanks for the great feedback guys. I honestly didn't know you guys would like it, I thought this would fall flat on it's ass :lol:!

If you're wondering where I got the idea, I just noticed this trend when looking for computer parts year after year.

And since I make fun of "uber MMORPG geeks" all the time, I put two and two together and realized that normal, functioning members of human society like Me and Junglizm should not be buying these parts. They are not for us. They are for people with no social life whatsoever.

The kinda people who jack off to hentai.

The kinda people like "Descent 1.0," but "Descent 2.0" is so vastly improved I look back at my former self in shame.

I'm just sick of seeing boobs on boxes. Macintosh video card upgrades should start having phalluses on their box to appeal to their demographic.

And FYI I come from a family of marketers so don't expect this to be my last thread in this style, it doesn't necessarily have to be about computers, "XTREME DEODORANT" comes to mind.
 

tw33k

Theoretical Realist
146
0
0
#17
They're real, and they're SPECTACULAR
 

tw33k

Theoretical Realist
146
0
0
#18
You'll have endless material, sex is used to sell absolutely everything. I'm sure you know what the no.1 thing the internet is surfed for. pr0n
 

jamesp

In Memory...
1,714
1
0
#20
Descent said:
I'm just sick of seeing boobs on boxes. Macintosh video card upgrades should start having phalluses on their box to appeal to their demographic.
Well, you just destroyed anything you might have gained from this thread. My PowerMac G4 will exterminate anything else, simply because Apple makes systems for video editing.