WTF ... IS WTF!?
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WORDS OF THE MESSENGER

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Stootchmaster
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My "Introduction thread" was locked by Swah already? And just when it was getting to be so popular. :(

Ah, very well, then.

I can hardly blame you for not wanting to look the fool for not knowing the difference between a question and an introduction. . .even though the original thread had QUESTION in giant letters in the title. I can see that your vanity will not allow you to admit mistakes. O VANITY! THY BITCHLY FACE IN THE MIRROR! THY WHORISH WEAKNESS! But I digress. . .

Looks like it's time to start spreading the Message through the rest of the forum anyway.
Lucky for you bitches I stumbled across your little village. Looks like you've been without a good preacher for a season.

Since it's late, why not start with a Psalm instead of a full sermon? I happen to have a nice one for the occasion!

A PSALM OF MODERATION
A meditation of The Fuck™

Blessings of The Fuck™ on the man who walketh not in the counsel of the bitch, nor standeth in the way of the righteous Messenger of The Fuck™, nor sitteth upon the throne of the mighty, reckoning himself to be high above the humble preachers of the dark path. Blessed is he who delights in the words of The Fuck™; and who doth show proper restraint and moderation unto the Messenger thereof.

O ye of little moderation! Woe unto thy bitchery! For do ye not speak with the voice of the bitch that hath no restraint, and doth live by unreasoned emotion? Shall not the voice of The Fuck™ speak forth as freely as any other? By thy righteous and restrained moderation shall the curse of the bitch be not proclaimed upon thy head, and the blessings of The Fuck™ shall be upon you! And it shall come to pass that your slitches will be many and tight.

But yet verily by thy unrighteous persecution of he who preacheth The Fuck™ shall that dark curse of bitch be proclaimed upon thee! O that bitchly curse! May thy faglames and lack of moderation be as the chaff upon the wind of the preacher's words, yea. . .even the voice of The Fuck™ as he names you bitch!

Therefore shall you be stood in judgement in the congregation of the righteous, for the proclamation of bitch upon thy head doth send thee forth from the company of man and into the unholy houses of the whore! For you have become as they. And in judgement, thy words will be found lacking worthiness in the eyes of men, for those with eyes to see thy bitchery shall stand upon the path of judgement, and thy verdict shall be righteous.

Amen
 
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Swah

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My "Introduction thread" was locked by Swah already? And just when it was getting to be so popular. :(

Ah, very well, then.

I can hardly blame you for not wanting to look the fool for not knowing the difference between a question and an introduction. . .even though the original thread had QUESTION in giant letters in the title. I can see that your vanity will not allow you to admit mistakes. O VANITY! THY BITCHLY FACE IN THE MIRROR! THY WHORISH WEAKNESS! But I digress. . .
Oh, what's in a name. Honestly, do you really think naming your cat "Dog" will make it go "Woof!"? If you can't handle a mod's decision, take it up with said mod, or an admin, via pm. We know what we're doing, that's no point of discussion. Just play by the rules, and you should be fine.

On topic: I will keep on neglecting to read your 'sermons' and 'psalms'.
 

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Stootchmaster
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It seems we're going to become friends, Swah, since you have night watch on the bitch-herd.
I find that the dark of early morning, when decent folk are asleep, is the best time to discuss things of The Fuck™.

Amen

On topic: I will keep on neglecting to read your 'sermons' and 'psalms'.
And that's just the way I like it, sir.
But you know, and I know, that you speak falsely.

Amen
 

Swah

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And that's just the way I like it, sir.
But you know, and I know, that you speak falsely.

Amen
I didn't speak falsely on the point of neglect. I glance over them, see who wrote them, and move on.

Also, do not multipost. Please read the rules on that one.
 

EvilDadII

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What's a sermon without a little gospel music (I know you said this wasn't a sermon, but that doesn't serve my purposes).

 

ryunp

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Just to keep you informed, atom, most people here have basic mental functionality and therefore will completely ignore you.

Also, to be an effective troll you must attract attention. So good luck buddy.
 
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Stootchmaster
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I didn't speak falsely on the point of neglect. I glance over them, see who wrote them, and move on.

Also, do not multipost. Please read the rules on that one.
I'm sure to be mocking your hypocrisy by quoting the post above at some point.
Everything a tool unto the preaching of The Fuck™, as it were.

As for the multi-post. . .the second one was quoting you as a reply.

Twitchy little guy, aren't you? Relax, son.
I mean you no harm, I'm just looking for someone.

Amen

Also, to be an effective troll you must attract attention. So good luck buddy.
As far as trolling, I am no troll, sir. Trolls, as far as I know, seek to disrupt or harm.
In exchange for the use of your forum, I seek only to contribute as I search for my lost brothers, not to disrupt or harm in any way.

Amen

**MOD-EDIT** Read the rules and comply. Multi-posting (the making of more than one post in succession of eachother) is not allowed, no matter your reason. This is an official warning. **/MOD-EDIT**
 

ryunp

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Disregarding the rules, especially after being explained and linked, is a bad idea. Your time is limited friend.
 

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Stootchmaster
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You mean the mods here consider quoting and reply as double-posting?
How. . .odd. Not really something I'm used to. Usually I'm encouraged to keep to a thread or two.
Your little village seems particularly nervous and frightened of outsiders.

Past trauma? Do tell.
Confession is good for the soul, my friends. . .why all the twitchiness?

Amen
 

Swah

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You mean the mods here consider quoting and reply as double-posting?
How. . .odd. Not really something I'm used to. Usually I'm encouraged to keep to a thread or two.
Your little village seems particularly nervous and frightened of outsiders.

Past trauma? Do tell.
Confession is good for the soul, my friends. . .why all the twitchiness?

Amen
Maybe you should try the tutorials. And don't hesitate to ask any questions not frequently asked.
 

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Stootchmaster
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I already asked one.

Why all the twitchy rules? Why is quoting and answering someone considered a double-post?
Confess, son. You've been attacked before, haven't you? I'd say several times from the detail on your ruleset.

Tell me of your fears, my newfound friend. Let the healing begin here.

Amen
 

-=iNsANe=-ADJ

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Hey atom, don't make it bad
take a sad song and make it better
remember to let her into your heart
then you can start to make it better.
 
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EvilDadII

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Your little village seems particularly nervous and frightened of outsiders.
Well, we do tend to shoot the MESSENGER in these parts. But frightened? Quite the contrary. Once eviscerated and marinated overnight in a decent Cotes-du-Rhone, outsiders are generally welcome. In your case however, we may have to go a little heavy on the garlic.
 

Swah

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Why all the twitchy rules? Why is quoting and answering someone considered a double-post?
Why rules? You should be able to answer that one by yourself. That second question, I believe, is answered in either the FAQ, the tutorials, otherwise, or all of those. I hope that helps.
 

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Stootchmaster
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Why rules? You should be able to answer that one by yourself. That second question, I believe, is answered in either the FAQ, the tutorials, otherwise, or all of those. I hope that helps.
No, no. . .I'm used to rules, and am nothing if not adaptive.
Try a bit of preaching on the Disney forums. Talk about harsh!

BUT. . .

The question was about the long, overly-detailed ruleset here and the jittery nature of everyone when it comes to the O So Terrible double-posting. I already know the answer, son. I was just wanting you to admit your fears. Like I said. . .confession is good for the soul, my friend.

That said (and since you would rather have a giant wall of text than for me to break things up into separate, yet related topics), I DO have a few more questions for you that aren't covered in your FAQ. By the way. . .I also have a FAQ that I'll post up eventually.
A beautiful piece of knowledge I humbly call The FuckFAQ™. . .BUT I DIGRESS!

QUESTIONS! I HAVE QUESTIONS! But don't we all, my son. . .don't we all?
(And I assume if I ask them in the Question section, they will be kneejerked up into the introduction section :fpalm: )

Let us begin with a bit of clarification. . .

I understand you want me to use the multi-quote feature instead of giving each reply the personally-directed attention it is due with a separate entry for each bitch who opposes me. Er. . .each person who replies to me, that is. BUT! If nobody repliies, yet I have related information that is pertinent to the topic of the thread at hand, am I expected to create a shiny new thread for each sermon, psalm, meditation, commentary, study, and righteous hymn that comes to mind?

See, normally how it works is that bitches who fear what I say appreciate me keeping my words and works in one or two unholy, on-topic areas instead of creating dozens of threads. Yeah. . .this is because I have a lot to say, and often it is read and not replied to. . .which is actually the way things are designed. TO EXPLAIN! Bitches herd. Bitches don't want to be seen as not being part of the herd. Therefore, if the herd is opposing me, someone who may be interested in what I'm saying will NOT reply for fear of being turned on by the herd. Understand, son? We can discuss, if you don't. As a matter of fact, I have several nice sermons on that very subject!

ANOTHER EXAMPLE!

A music thread! Let us pretend I want to create a thread of music for proper meditation of The Fuck™. I'm fairly certain you don't have one yet. Correct me if I'm wrong. But let us say that I wish to create such a wonderful thing for your listening enjoyment. . .If I start a music thread with a video of Screaming Baby Jesus and The Fapmasters singing their beautiful rendition of "Breaking of The Slitch" and nobody responds. . .do I THEN create ANOTHER music thread to post a second video of the Stinkfish singing "Whores of The World"? Maybe instead of replying, people just click the video and enjoy the sweet sounds. Is another entire thread necessary for each unresponded video I may feel like posting?

Look, my new-found friend. I realize that you don't know who I am, or why exactly I'm here (beyond the few vague hints I've given so far), but the organization I belong to has about 400 brothers. A good number of them tend to follow me to and fro, watching and silently enjoying my intereaction with bitches. Often, I will write to THEM instead of anyone on a site I expect to respond, so some of my posts will seem extremely strange. Just relax. I'm here looking for someone, is all.
If the brothers find I am receiving my proper due, then your site will see a sweet bump in traffic.

THIS is what I'm bringing, if you let me, son. Don't be so twitchy.


Amen

THE PATH OF DARKNESS
Sermon of The Fuck™#20

Heed ye the words of The Messenger, my bretheren! And in them ye will find the strength, the courage, the understanding, and verily the righteous rewards that are conferred thereby upon the dark path of The Fuck™. Strengthen ye thy weak knees and steady thy shaking hand, for I say unto them that are of a fearful heart, be strong, fear not; behold The Fuck™ shall provide!

Yea, that unholy gospel shall place in thy hand the keys of thy dark vengeance! Then shall thy eyes no longer be blinded by the panties of the stootch, O those cursed panties! Then shall thy ears be opened, and not blocked by the screaming of the slitch, O that cursed screaming slitch! Then shall you be freed from the chains of the whore, O those terrible binding chains of the whore! Then shall thy hand rise and slap as the pimp the bitch that doth oppress you, O the gathering bitches! Then shall thy tongue be loosed, that you may mock those that hath mocked you, O the mockery of the bitch! For in the electronic wilderness shall The Fuck™ be as a stream in the desert, and the parched ground that cursed my lost brothers shall become a promised land of pussy!

And verily I say unto thee, my brothers, that through the promised land of pussy shall run a dark path, and it shall be called The Fuck™, the way of righteous vengeance; the bitch shall not travel the path of The Fuck™, but it shall be for those who can see what has always been before them, and for those who hear the silent voice that is the unholy spirit of The Fuck™. Yea, my bretheren, In truth I testify there shall be suffered no bitch upon that straight and narrow path!

May your slitches be many and tight.

Amen

A DEDICATION OF THIS PLACE IS HEREBY GIVEN. . .

Sing ye unto The Fuck™, O ye bretheren! And give thanks at the dedication of this holy place!
For thy anger hath built these walls, and thy vengeance hath laid the cornerstone, and though thy weeping for the whore may endure for a night, joy at her humiliation cometh in the morning and comfort thee. And in thy works is thy dedication, that thou shalt not be moved by the tears of the stootch.

O Brothers, by thy hands thou hast made the brotherhood a mountain that standeth strong! Hide not thy face in shame and be not troubled, for thy work is righteous, and thy Fuck™ be a testimony unto the whore, that she find her place in the Holy Whoritorium and yea that she doth live in her station.

FOR WHAT PROFIT IS THERE IN A DEAD WHORE, MY BRETHEREN? What profit in the blood of the stootch? When she goeth to her deserved hell, shall the dust of her earthly form praise thee? Shall it declare thy truth? Shall thy works be wasted on death when there is misery in the life of the whore? YEA, THAT SHE BE A WALKING AND BREATHING TESTIMONY? Hear, O brothers, and have mercy upon the whore, that she doth not perish by thy hand. . .that her misery be the scripture she receiveth from a missionary of The Fuck™, and one that she readeth often.

O Brothers, heed The Messenger. . .hast The Fuck™ not turned my mourning into joy, and girded me with gladness? Out of death has there not come a brotherhood? And do not my bretheren deserve praise for the multitude of works that have arisen in the name of one who rests at peace, no longer at war with the whore? From 3 hath come forth many unto the path of Punishment, Atonement, Humliation, and Misery of the whore. O brothers, I sing praise to thee, and will not be silent. Verily the dedication of this holy place shall be in thy name.

May your slitches be many and tight.

Amen
 
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