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Yo mamma jokes

tkme2thebedroom

standard people-hater
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#1
Alright...here it is. The end all be all of joke about the mothers of the world. I want all the best, the dirtiest, and even classic yo mamma jokes. Have fun with this one, I know I will.

example one: Your mamma is so fat, when she was born she gave the hospital stretchmarks.

Of course, this is a very old and bad joke, so please post your own original defamy of mum's everywhere, unless you think one is just too witty and great to ignore.

Much thanks!
 

LiberatioN

Trance Addict
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#3
why dont i just go to a joke forum and rip some off the intarweb? sheesh, dont be lazy. :D


In any case, I'll participate:

Your momma is so stupid, she sat and stared at a carton of orange juice because it said 'Concentrate'.

heard it? too fuckin bad.
 
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#4
Isn't there already one of these threads?

Oh well, Yo momma is so stupid she got locked in a foood store and starved to death.
 

Brazen

BAD, BOLD, BRAZEN
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#5
your mom is so stupid, she brought a spoon to the super bowl.
 
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#7
Your momma's so stupid she fails to realize that your momma jokes are not funny and are, in fact, quite lame.
 

Slacker

Postaholic
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#10
Your moma so stupid she sat on the T.V. and watched the couch
 

WaFfLeS

Banned - What an Asshat!
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#11
Yo mama so fat when you get on top of her your ears pop!
Yo mamma so fat you haveta roll over twice to get off her...

Yo mama so fat when she bungee jumps, she brings down the bridge too

Yo momma's so fat, when she wore a shirt with an AA on it, people thought it was American Airlines biggest jet.

Yo mama so fat when her beeper goes off, people thought she was backing up

Yo mama so fat her nickname is "Lardo"

Yo mama so fat she eats Wheat Thicks.

Yo mama so fat were in her right now

Yo mama so fat people jog around her for exercise

Yo mama so fat she went to the movies and sat next to everyone

Yo mama so fat she has been declared a natural habitat for Condors

Yo mama so fat she was floating in the ocean and spain claimed her for then new world

Yo mama so fat she lay on the beach and people run around yelling Free Willy

Yo mama so fat she put on her lipstick with a paint-roller

Yo mama so fat when she has wants someone to shake her hand, she has to give directions!

Yo mama so fat she goes to a resturant, looks at the menu and says "okay!"

Yo mama so fat when she wears a yellow raincoat, people said "Taxi!"

Yo mama so fat she had to go to Sea World to get baptized

Yo mama so fat she got to iron her pants on the driveway

Yo mama so fat she got to pull down her pants to get into her pockets

Yo mama so fat when she tripped over on 4th Ave, she landed on 12th

Yo mama so fat she fell in love and broke it.

Yo mama so fat the highway patrol made her wear "Caution! Wide Turn"

Yo mama so fat when she sits around the house, she SITS AROUND THE HOUSE!

Yo mama so fat when she steps on a scale, it read "one at a time, please"

Yo mama so fat when she sits on my face I can't hear the stereo.

Yo mama so fat she looks like she's smuggling a Volkswagon!

Yo mama so fat when she gets on the scale it says to be continued.

Yo mama so fat when she gets on the scale it says we don't do livestock.

Yo mama so fat her neck looks like a pair of hot dogs!

Yo mama so fat she's got her own area code!

Yo mama so fat even Bill Gates couldn't pay for her liposuction!

Yo mama so fat God couldn't light Earth until she moved!

Yo mama so fat NASA has to orbit a satellite around her!

Yo mama so fat whenever she goes to the beach the tide comes in!

Yo mama so fat when she plays hopscotch, she goes New York, L.A., Chicago...

Yo mama so fat she's got Amtrak written on her leg.

Yo mama so fat when she bunje jumps she goes straight to hell!

Yo mama so fat her legs is like spoiled milk - white & chunky!

Yo mama so fat I had to take a train and two buses just to get on the her good side!

Yo mama so fat she wakes up in sections!

Yo mama so fat when she goes to an amusement park, people try to ride HER!

Yo mama so fat she sat on a quarter and a booger shot out of george washington's nose.

Yo mama so fat she rolled over 4 quarters and it made a dollar!

Yo mama so fat when she lies on the beach no one else gets sun!

Yo mama so fat that her senior pictures had to be arial views!

Yo mama so fat when she jumps up in the air she gets stuck!!!

Yo mama so fat she's got more Chins than a Hong Kong phone book!

Yo mama so fat she's on both sides of the family!

Yo mama so fat everytime she walks in high heels, she strikes oil!

Yo mama so fat she fell and made the Grand Canyon!

Yo mama so fat she sat on the beach and Greenpeace threw her in!


I'm sorry...
 

dzaykim

Toss my salad
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#13
I'd rather read it here than have to go to a pop-up infested site smeared with adds and spyware.
 
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#14
Linksy said:
you just copied and paste those from http://ahajokes.com or somthing like that
I just went there so I could randomly insult people with some high quality momma jokes.

ahajokes.com said:
Yo mama so stupid when she saw the NC-17 (under 17 not admitted) sign, she went home and got 16 friends
:rotflmao:

We have a little explanation of what NC-17 means. For those a bit sloooooooow...
 
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#16
Yo momma so stupid she thinks momma jokes are funny.


...
 

PatticusRex

Powdered Toast Man
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#17
Your mom is so fat she uses matresses for tampons

Your mom is so fat she went to a buffet in high heels and came out with flip flops..

Your mom is so fat she had to get a tattoo removal via sandblaster

Your mom is so fat she eats cookies like tic tacs

Your mom is so fat when she does the splits, she gives the road a hickey.

...hmmm

your mom is so fat, when she told me her weight, I thought it was her phone number.'




Gradeschool humour at its finest.
 

Slacker

Postaholic
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#19
yo mama so fat she doesnt have periods anymo she has exclamation points!!
 
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#20
Your momma is so fat that her stretch marks spell out what she is BIG BITCH.

Your momma is so fat that she has area codes all over her body.

Your momma is so fat that HOLY SHIT WTF IS THAT HUGE BLOB BEHIND YOU.


LAUGH AND THE WORLD LAUGHS AT YOU
:fuckoff: